这一点的话,基本上是对权威的尊敬和信任带来的压力使人们对权利盲目服从。
其实这一点的话,鲁迅先生早已说过“从来如此,便对么?”
与其相信别人,不如自己努力成长,早日成为权威。
When I was a freshman in college I watched the film Gua Sha Treatment for the first time, now I am a junior student and I come back to review the movie from a multicultural aspect, I have many different feelings after watching the film again.
At the beginning of the film, XuDatong is given an award and later he delivers a speech. What makes me impressed most is in his speech he says “one day I will become one of you, a truly successful American, today this award proved that America is a true land of opportunity and I am the living proof of that.” At that moment Xu thinks he has realized his American Dream totally with his lovingly wife and adorable son. However, I think it is ironical that to make a speech like that and I assume it is made on purpose to hind a clue for the story's development. How many non—American people have such a beautiful American dream? One of my classmate studies in American now and before he went aboard he told me his American dream is he can stand at the top of the New York. To be honest, I also dream that one day I can get the Green Card living there happily and successfully maybe working at the Wall Street. When Xu gets the award he thinks he entirely melted in the melting pot neglecting the multicultural obstruct, later the plot goes against the way he thinks. And later Quinlan asked Xu'why you be the scapegoat of your father?' Xu answers 'because he is Chinese.' Then maybe Xu knows that there is always a wide gap between Chinese and American cultures.
The second scene is Xu hit his son Denis because Denis hit the son of xu's boss, at the middle of the film xu tells his boss that he hit his own son is only to show his respect to his boss John Quinlan, that time Quinlan feels puzzled “what a Chinese logic”,yes, American can never understand such a logic full of Chinese characteristic, because they respect everyone including the children, they won't beat a child to please the boss, and there is no such a conception of degree between employee and employer, they feel everyone is equal, which is quite different from china.
Connected to the second scene, the third difference I want to analyze is the care for the children. In America, people pay more attention to the right of children which can be seen from the law—leaving children alone at home is illegal, while in China it is so common that almost everyone may experience such loneliness. And Children Welfare Agency does work in America which shows the importance Americans attach to children's right. What's more, I remember a line 'No one won the case, especially the child.' In my opinion, it also manifests the universal concern from the American public to the children.
The fourth aspect is following the procedure, in the film, more than there times, the people focus on the rule, the law, the procedure. At the Christmas Eve Xu wants to return back to his home pretending as a Santa Claus, what a pity, the security recognizes him and persuades 'you are always a good tenement, never causes troubles for me.' And another scene is at the end of the film , the judge says 'I have to follow the procedure.' However, in China people always have to ask for a favor to do something, and later you have to pay back the favor,for myself, I prefer the American style, strict to the procedure.
The fifth and the last point is the humors, Quinlan says 'you can't fall, your health security is the company paid.' 'Datong, welcome home, maybe next time, you can come from the front door.' 'dady, why you come from the window' ' because we don't have a chimney.' I really adore this distinguished American humor, especially in dangerous situations, which is quite rare in China.
That's my whole reaction to Gua Sha Treatment.
古人言:投之以桃,报之以李。正因为互惠原则的存在才将人与人之间的`关系逐步拉近。当然也有部分人利用互惠心理,采取四两拨千斤的柔道手法施以诡计,从而达成自己的目的.。在车站被塞礼物要钱的事情,很多人都碰到,我也不例外。起初会因为不好意思而为突如其来的礼物买单,碰到的次数多了对此心生厌恶,也会坚决以冷漠回应。互惠原理应该是善意回报善意,而不是用善意回报诡计。
在社交方面,我一直是一个很被动运用互惠原理的人。就拿简单的请客吃饭来说,回想起来过去的无数次饭局,大抵是我的朋友们率先发起的,我请他们吃饭更多的是扮演回馈他们之前好意的角色。到达一个陌生的圈子时,发现自己很难去快速融入。反思之后,觉得症结在于自己在社交方面过于被动,其实我也可以主动先成为先施惠于他人的人,从而得到更多的反馈。当我留心主动去帮别人一些小忙之后,发现彼此间的关系慢慢拉近,而且遇到需要请教他人的问题时我心理上会轻松很多。
昨天读了《影响力》这本书,书中所提出的6个影响力的武器,在日常工作中可以使用的地方有很多,对于工作帮助很大。
“权威”这个名词,自小就播种在我们的脑海里,小时候父母是我们的权威,上学后老师是我们的权威,工作后业界的大佬们又渐渐成了我们的权威。这种意识无处不在,但是能够善用它的却不多。
现实生活中,很多人对权威的信服,使他们慢慢地变成了盲目地自动顺从。因为他们觉得根据以往的经验在权威期面前思考或是质疑几乎成为一件多余的事情,因此渐渐放弃了独立思考,习惯了机械式的反应。
来自权威的分享或者告诫,确实能够指引我们少走弯路,甚至在某些方面可以寻找到达成目标的捷径。但是凡事过呦则不及,过度的依赖权威,会让我们丢失自我,永远的生活在权威的天花板下,很难有突破,甚至受权威所累。比如,工作中如果你永远以老板的要求为准绳,百分之百和顺从和照做,那么你的老板就是你的天花板;但如果你在老板要求的基础上,有自己独立的思考和见解,你的成长会加速,你的天花板也就掌握在了自己的手里。
从另一个角度来看,如何利用“权威”这一影响力工具,达成自己的目标呢?比如,代销金融产品需要去其他金融机构做委托人及金融产品的尽职调查,去之前我会做详细的准备,了解他们公司及产品以及市场上同类产品的情况,并特意设计好几个问题。第一次做这件事其实我的内心是有几分胆怯和担忧的,但是为了达成合作以及争取到有利于我方的条件,初次的见面我必须想方设法树立自己专业懂行的形象,而不是一副稚嫩新手的样子。因为大家普遍的心态是愿意认可专业与权威。
我理解的这点,就是人们都会为自己说过的话,承诺的事情而负责。于是一旦我们主动承诺了做什么事情,哪怕是自己不情愿的,也会逼迫自己去完成。
所以在每个月分解目标的时候,可以主动引导客服人员说出自己的目标,加强他们的责任感,从而使目标更加可以被保障完成。
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