学生自由表达:我想这样修改我的文章……
那天我起得特别早也特别兴奋,因为我和妈妈要去我梦寐以求的香港迪士尼乐园。
早就听说迪士尼乐园有很多好玩的项目了,一进入迪士尼乐园大门我们的`眼前就出现了一座梦幻城堡,那里有:驰车天地、小熊—维尼历险记、巴斯光年星际历险、飞越太空山、泰山树屋、森林河流之旅……,一个个精彩的项目让我们目不暇接。
最好玩的当然是森林河流之旅,这是一个水上游戏,我们坐在一个木船上,沿着一条河穿过一片森林,途中惊险而又刺激,大象喷水、火山爆发、“食人族”射毒镖……都是在你毫无防备之下突然出现的,船上的我不时发出阵阵尖叫声。
最恐怖的是飞越太空山,坐在一个小火车上在黑暗的太空中好似迷失了方向般到处乱窜,太惊险刺激了,妈妈都不敢玩。
最有趣是巴斯光年星际历险, 它是让你坐着一个小火车在宇宙中打枪,因为小火车在行驶中不停的摇动,目镖也在不停的晃动,在这种情况下要打中是很不容易的。玩了两次后我发现只有对着目标连续发射命中率就会提高,我最好的成绩是成为了太空技师,最棒的是太空战士。
夜晚,迪斯尼的上空放出了一朵朵的焰火。啊!美丽极了。怀着依依不舍的心情我们踏上了回家的路。迪士尼乐园给我带来了许多快乐,下次我还要去日本迪斯尼和美国迪斯尼。
1、小组交流:我觉得我的文章这儿写得比较好……
2、请部分学生上台宣读自己的习作,师生点评。
I Like Disneyland
I get to know Disneyland a year ago,at the time,my mother took me to Hong Kong,I
was so happy,we went to Disneyland,I saw many lovely cartoon characters。I saw them
when I was watching TV,I felt so happy,I told my mother I wanted to come to here
again soon。I like Disneyland so much,I want to live in theDisneylandworld。
Last Saturday,with all my classmates and teachers,I went on a trip to the nature park .We departed from school at about half past seven and spent about 40 minutes travelling to our destination.When we first entered into the park,all of us were shocked by the natural beauty and the hamonized ecosystem of the park.Then,happily we were playing games on the sand; swimming in the pool and taking with our friends on the grassplot.After lunch break,our programs were continued with an contest of story narating held and each of us was immerging within the funny stories We left the part at about 5 o'clock,and unitl now,most of us are still haunted by the beautiful memory of that trip.
师:这堂课,我们尝试着把语文课外实践活动与课内的写作结合起来。课前,大家发扬合作精神通过查资料、请教别人等各种途径获取多种信息,然后发挥想象,精心构思了一个又一个精彩的故事。课上,大家能根据自己的不同情况选择写作方式进行写作;而自信的展示、客观的评价、自主的修改,使你们的作品锦上添花。课后,请大家继续修改自己的习作再送交老师阅评。
板书设计:
1、续写:根据小说的故事情节,展开丰富的想象,使故事进一步发展,再次创编故事。
2、续写的要求:
(1)人物性格、语言风格尽量与原文保持一致。
(2)情节合理、完整。
(3)想象要有创意。
(4)描写要具体生动。
3、续写的类型:
(1)给一个开头,要求续写成一篇文章。
(2)阅读一篇小说,把握人物性格特点,在文章结尾处加以续写。
写作要求:
(1)围绕结尾句选材、续写。
(2)通过细节描写,表现人物性格特点
可是他的父亲,对于他的喜欢绘画,又在开始嘀咕了……
你可以选择:
(1)记录故事:把刚才看到的、听到的写下来。
(2)续编故事:接着刚才看到的、听到的故事写下去。
(3)创编故事:自己根据理解自主创作。
教学探讨:在编排演课本剧的基础上续写小说,这是一个全新的尝试。对于学生而言,这是一个具有挑战性的、有意义的、能激起他们热情和兴趣的.工作。当然,从阅读体验到表演心理体验,再到创造、创新,对学生的要求相当高,所花费的时间也较多。
1、各大组代表向全班同学报告本组课本剧编排演的分工合作准备过程。教师记载,作为期末综合评价内容之一。
2、四个大组轮流表演课本剧。
3、讨论、评点:
师:请同学们评一评,刚才课本剧表演是不是小说《清兵卫与葫芦》情节的继续发展。
学生发言。教师根据他们的发言,结合课本剧表演的内容,启发思维,拓宽学生的写作思路。
师:他们的表演,情节虽然不同,但具有一些共同特点。
学生发言,教师总结强调:
(1)围绕“可是他的父亲,对于他的喜欢绘画,又在开始嘀咕了”编剧。
(2)通过人物的动作、语言、神态,来表现人物性格特点
(3)想象合理。
4、提出本次习作要求。(见板书设计)
Smoking is a bad habit that does harm to smoker and others. Many kinds of diseases and cancers are caused by smoking, such as tracheitis, lung cancer and many other diseases. Recent years, there are tens of thousands of people dying of smoking. But there still are many people enjoying smoking, because they think smoking is a kind of fashion and smoking is so cool, especially among teenagers. In addition, smoking does harm to others as well. Second hand smoking has been recognized harmful to other people. Even worse, it may cause more damages. Therefore, people should remember that smoking is harmful to others and those people who smokes should give up smoking as soon as possible.
吸烟是个坏习惯,它对吸烟者和别人都有害。很多疾病和癌症是有吸烟引起的,比如说气管炎,肺癌还有很多其他疾病。近年来,成千上万的人死于吸烟。但是仍然有很多人喜欢吸烟,因为他们认为吸烟是一种时尚,很酷,特别是青少年。另外,吸烟也会对别人有害。二手烟是公认的对别人有害的。更糟糕的是,它会带来更多伤害。因此,人们应该牢记吸烟有害他人,那些吸烟的人应该尽可能戒烟。
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