Dec. 7th
Dear mother,
I have been good at school. I often think of you when I go to bed because we always go for a walk before go to bed at home. So I miss you everyday. Do you miss me? Why don’t you call me? I’ve got a lot of things to tell you. One of the things is about foreign teacher’s daughter. Her name’s Skyler. She lives in Canada. She comes to our class to learn Chinese and English with me in my class. This afternoon, when it was art and craft class, our class were cleaning the gymnasium. And she did it with us too. So I usually talk to her when she doesn’t know what to do? But when the class is over, I always haven’t got enough time to talk to her. And I usually can’t find her. So we don’t have time to introduce to each other. But it is the first time that I have a foreign student. So I’m very happy! Mum, you often tell me, “If you are happy, I’ll be happy, too.” So you have to be happy, because I’m happy! I like you when you are happy!
In the end I wish you everything is just fine!
Yours,
Sophia
整部小说是一封陌生女人的信件,整个故事是一场“旷日持久”的暗恋。
十三岁时对男主一见钟情,直到她搬家也一直没有告诉过他;她攒够了钱回去“偶遇”他,和他有了一夜的感情,他又以出差的理由离开;她默默地为他生下孩子,为了孩子能有好的生活委身于他人,再次与他相遇时他却根本没有认出他。即便如此,她还是一直爱着他,同时又隐瞒着这份爱,直到孩子病重身亡才写信告诉他所有的真相。
第一次读这本书是在高中,这周又读了一遍。以前读的时候只觉得悲情,还会觉得女主很傻。“我要你一辈子想到我的时候,心里没有忧愁。我宁可独自承担一切后果,也不愿变成你的一个累赘”,所以即使她怀上了他的孩子也对他守口如瓶,为了让孩子过上贵族的生活她宁愿卖身做有钱人的情人也不向他要钱。大概很多人都会觉得女主这样做根本就不值得,为了一个不爱自己的人耗尽了自己的一生。
但几年过后的现在,见过了身边人的分分合合,听过了很多别人的故事,慢慢开始理解了这种“情不知所起,一往而深”中的爱恨纠缠。就像小说中女主角对男主角一见钟情的场景:“亲爱的,在一刹那接触到你充满柔情蜜意的眼光后,我就明白,我已经完全属于你了。”“我以为,你眼中的柔情蜜意只是针对我一个人的。就在这一瞬间,我内心的热情全被点燃了。突然之间,我觉得自己一下子长大成熟了,变成一个完全属于你的女人。”现在再读这本书,反而觉得很羡慕女主身上那种跨越时代的坚韧和勇敢,因为很难想象有人能这样地去爱另一个人,所以看到这样的故事会觉得格外感动。
我一直觉得,爱一个人是一种能力。有的人也许是没有遇到合适的人,有的人也许天生就没有爱人的能力比如我,我总觉得我爱自己更多一些。可是当读到女主角说的:“我仿佛是你口袋里的怀表,绷紧着发条,而你却感觉不到。这根发条在暗中耐心地为你数着一分一秒,为你计算时间,带着沉默的心跳陪着你东奔西走,而在它那滴答不停的几百万秒当中,你可能只会匆匆地瞥它一眼。”我还是会觉得很感动,好像自己在一瞬间就感受到了爱情。
记得王小波说过一句话:“你要是愿意,我就永远爱你;你要是不愿意,我就永远相思。”整本书里最让我泪目的就是这句:“我对你的心灵来说,无论是相隔无数的山川峡谷,还是在我们的目光只有一线之隔,其实,都是同样的遥远。”看完觉得心里很难受,释怀是避免痛苦的出路,但爱情偏偏不易释怀。
很多年前读过夏宇的一首小诗,到现在还记忆犹新,觉得用在这里正好,分享给大家。
Dear mother,
How'severything going at home? I miss you and dad very much.
Iam pretty good in school, so you and dad do not have to worry about me. I am asenior student in high school so that I am busy with my study all the time. I workhard to prepare the college entrance examination and I think I do a great job now.Teachers care much about me and when I have problems, I always ask them. They encourageme very often, considering that I can go to the university I dream of. Ofcourse, I take good care of myself in life. I build good relationships with myfriends and classmates, which makes me happy to be with them.
Pleasetake good care of yourselves at home. I love you. Truly yours, Christina
亲爱的妈妈:
家里一切都好吗?我很想念您和爸爸。
我在学校很好,所以你们不用担心我。我现在是高三的学生了,因此我一直忙于学习,努力准备高考。我想我现在的状态很好。老师们很关心我,我遇到问题的`时候,都会积极地向老师提问。他们会常常鼓励我,对我也有信心,认为我能考上我理想中的学校。当然,在生活上我也能很好地照顾自己。我和朋友以及同学关系很好,和他们一起学习生活,我很快乐。
在家里请你和爸爸照顾好自己,我爱你们。
您亲爱的克里斯蒂娜
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