今天要介绍的这位励志先锋人物叫邓衍晨,他毕业于福建师范大学数学与计算机科学学院,并被保送到重庆大学攻读硕士研究生。在我们采访的每一个励志先锋人物背后都隐藏着一段段辛酸、困苦的悲情故事,但是他们都没有在逆境中怨天尤人自暴自弃,而是以一种积极乐观的心态去面对,邓衍晨的励志故事也不例外。
记者见到邓衍晨时,很难将眼前这个腿脚行走不便,不爱说话的小伙子与推荐表中那个屡次获得学校奖学金,在校期间参加多个国家级课题组,发表多篇论文的励志人物联系起来。
对于自己的身体缺陷小邓并不避讳,他告诉记者,因为身体原因他的之路变得异常艰辛。
靠着不比别人差的信念和顽强的毅力,小邓不仅顺利读完初中高中,而且高考时还以全班第九名的成绩考入福建师范大学,就读他最感兴趣的计算机专业。
很多人宅在宿舍都在打游戏,邓衍晨却把大把的时间用在了计算机新技术的钻研上,因为专业知识过硬,小邓在大三时就被选入老师的课题组,负责国家级项目的研究。
除了学习,小邓也热心志愿者工作,从一进入大学,他就参加了学校的义务电脑维修队,大二的时候他还被推选为义务维修队的队长,免费为全校的师生解决电脑的各类故障。
虽然在学弟学妹眼中他已然是一个身残志坚的学习榜样,但是小邓却并不满足,他相信努力是交给生命最好的答卷。
早晨,刚一下火车就看见云朵妹妹向我们微笑;蓝天哥哥向我们招手;太阳公公向我们问好,我的心情也像这天气一样好。
来福建的第一天下午我们就来到了金山公园。这里的面积非常大,绿化也非常好,花草树木随处可见。正当我陶醉其中时,一阵优美动听的声音打断了我的思绪,我抬头一看,原来是一对可爱的黄鹂鸟在树枝上唱歌呢!嗯,黄鹂鸟的声音可真是名不虚传啊! 走过石子路,我便来到了赫赫有名的长廊。我开始浮想联翩起来:这里如果刚下过雨,我一个人在这慢慢地散步,欣赏这美丽的景色,听着小鸟那动听的歌声,看着蝴蝶在翩翩起舞,那该是多么美好多么惬意呀!在不知不觉的幻想中,我来到了荷花池。呀!真大!足足有两个黎河公园那么大呢!忽然,我看见妹妹与弟弟在拿着荷叶在嬉戏打闹。我刚准备摘一朵和他们一起玩耍,却被妈妈立即制止了,说是破坏环境也不文明。我委屈极了 ,心想:他们为什么可以摘,但我却不可以呢?
随后,我们便踏上了回家的路。走着走着,一位工作人员把他们手中的荷花无情地扔进了垃圾桶中,他俩先是一愣,然后尴尬极了。我狡猾的微微一笑,心想:嘿嘿,刚才幸好妈妈及时制止了我……
夜幕来临时 ,我们吃完了牛排,一起来到了人人皆知的万达广场,这是一座大型的购物广场。它外形高大,里面的装饰很精巧,给人一种舒适的感觉。还有各种各样的小吃店铺. 服装店铺……应有尽有,物美价廉。我们在这里买了许多的物品后,就心满意足地回家了。
随着时间的流逝,一天就这么过完了…… 第二天下午,我怀着激动的心情,来到了一直想去的地方——蔚蓝的大海。我飞快的脱掉鞋子,站在海边,微风轻轻地吹拂着我的头发,轻吻着我的脸颊,这种喜悦的心情使我无法描述。换上泳衣,去游泳,一路上我们捡了许多贝壳留做纪念……登上回宿松的火车,我一直依依不舍,这,使我流连忘返……
1。 头绪分明,脉络清楚
写好记叙文,首先要头绪分明,脉络清楚,明确文章要求写什么。要对所写的事件或人物进行分析,弄清事件发生、发展一直到结束的整个过程,然后再收集选取素材。这些素材都应该跟上述五个“ W ”和一个“ H ”有关。尽管不是每篇记叙文里都必须包括这些“ W ”和“ H ”,但动笔之前,围绕五个“ W ”和“ H ”进行构思是必不可少的。
2。 突出中心,详略得当
在文章的框架确定后,对支持故事的素材的选取是很关键的。选材要注意取舍,应该从表现文章主题的需要出发,分清主次,定好详略。要突出重点,详写细述那些能表现文章主题的重要情节,略写粗述那么非关键的次要情节。面面俱到反而使情节罗列化,使人不得要领。这一点是写好记叙文要解决的一个基本问题,也需要一定的技巧。如:
One night a man came to our house and told me, "There is a family with eight children。 They have not eaten for days。" I took some food with me and went。
When I finally came to that family, I saw the faces of those little children disfigured (破坏外貌) by hunger。 There was no sorrow or sadness in their faces, just the deep pain of hunger。
I gave the rice to the mother。 She divided the rice in two, and went out, carrying half the rice。 When she came back, I asked her, "Where did you go?" she gave me this simple answer, "To my neighbors — they are hungry also!"
3。 用活语言,准确生动
记叙文要用具体的事件和生动的语言对人、事、物加以叙述。一篇好的记叙文的语言既要准确、生动,又要表现力强,这样才能把人、事描写得具体生动,其可读性才强。试比较下面一篇例文修改的前后效果。
原文:
One day Xiaoqiang was wandering away。 He was soon lost among people and traffic。 He could not find the way back home and started crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by found him standing alone in front of a shop and crying。 They went up to Xiaoqiang and asked him what had happened。 Xiaoqiang told them how he got lost and where he lived。 The two students decided to take him home。 Mother was pleased to see Xiaoqiang come back safe and sound。 She invited the two students into the house and gave them some money, but they didn't take it。 She served them with tea but they left。
修改后:
The other day, five-year-old Xiaoqiang left home alone and wandered happily in the street。 After some time, he felt hungry so he wanted to go back home。 But he found he was lost among the crowded people and heavy traffic。 When he could not find the way home, he started and crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by from school found him sanding crying in front of a shop。 They immediately went up to him。
"Little boy, why are you standing here crying?" they asked。
"I want Mom, I go home。" said the boy, still crying。
"Don't worry, we'll send you home。"
And they spent the next two hours looking for the boy's house。 With the help of a policeman, they finally found it。
When the worried mother saw her son come back safe and sound, she was so thankful and she invited the students into her house。 Gratefully, she offered them some money, saying it was a way to express her thanks, but the young students firmly refused it and left without even a cup of tea。
“十一”黄金周,爸爸妈妈开车带我去了美丽的旅游圣地---泰宁。
我们乘坐游船去游览大金湖。那里的水碧绿碧绿的,清澈见底,偶尔也能发现一些小鱼小虾在水中嬉戏。
我们乘着游船去了第一景点—野趣园。那里最好玩的就是荡秋千,我让妈妈把秋千荡的老高老高,真刺激!
随后去了《三国演义》里最著名的甘露寺。甘露寺是用一根柱子撑起来的\',那根柱子名叫如意柱,到达如意柱的台阶共有一百零一级。爸爸说:“上去的时候要抱抱如意柱。”我第一个冲上去,抱了如意柱,又飞快地登上甘露寺。
第三个景点是在陆地上斜着的一线天——陆地斜线天。那里又惊险又刺激,我们一个个小心翼翼的低着头、弯着身子、扶着岩石,艰难的走着。通过了陆地斜线天,又去了十里平湖。
愉快的金湖之旅结束了,我很开心,下次我还想去那里玩。
导入:
第1段:Recently we’ve had a discussion about whether we should... (导入话题
Our opinions are divided on this topic.(观点有分歧
正文:
第2段:Most of the students are in favour of it.(正方观点
Here are the reasons. First... Second... Finally...(列出2~3个赞成的理由
第3段:However, the others are strongly against it. (反方观点
Their reasons are as follows. In the first place... What’s more... In addition...(列出2~3个反对的理由
结论:
第4段:Personally speaking, the advantages overweigh the disadvantages, for it will do us more harm than good, so I support it.(个人观点 オ
Last Sunday, Jim went out to fly a kite. The kite flew highly in the sky. Jim ran with it happily.
Suddenly the line was broken and the kite flew away. Soon it disappeared. Where was it?
Jim had no idea. So he had to run here and there to look for the kite. At last he saw it on the top of the tree. He tried to get it down. But he couldn’t. He felt sad.
导入:
第1段:提出一种现象或某个决定作为议论的话题
As a student, I am strongly in favour of the decision. (亮明自己的观点是赞成还是反对
The reasons for this may be listed as follows. (过渡句,承上启下
正文:
第2段:First of all... Secondly... Besides...(列出2~3个赞成或反对的`理由
结论:
第3段:In conclusion, I believe that... (照应第1段,构成\"总—分—总\"结构
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