作文600字带点评(600字的优秀作文及点评)

作文600字带点评(600字的优秀作文及点评)

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作文600字带点评(600字的优秀作文及点评)

作文600字带点评【一】

Computer is important.

We must learn English well.

It's very important for us to...

In my opinion...

作文600字带点评【二】

Why Are Trees Important?

Trees are very important to us. Do you know why? Let me tell you.

Trees take in carbon dioxide from the air and make oxygen. That's important. People and animals need oxygen to live. Many small animals and insects live in the trees. Some of them also get food from trees. Trees can also stop water and soil from going away. If we have a lot of trees, we stop deserts from being large. I think this is very important. You know, trees are green. They can make our country even more beautiful.

Trees are our good friends. We should plant more trees and take good care of them.

点评:文章先阐明论点,接着论证,最后重申自己的观点。

范文2

It's Our Duty To Protect Our Environment

It's our duty to protect our environment. Where we live? The earth. The earth is the only one place we live in. So you know how important the environment is. But now, some people are harming the environment, like cutting down trees, drawing pictures on public walls, littering onto the ground. It's terrible if we still do it. Now, it's time for all the people in the society to protect the environment. It's our duty. It needs each of us to make a contribution to improving the environment. We should make our environment more and more beautiful.

点评:作者多用学过的'词语不但保证了正确,还巩固了所学的知识,并且注意句型的多样化,如长句,短句,疑问句,使用了“if,so, now, but”等词,整篇文章读起来朗朗上口。实际上,写文章就像串珠子,连接词就在于把一个个单词串起来。

作文600字带点评【三】

如果你的前路有阴影,别怕,那是因为你背后有阳光。

——题记

我住的镇上有一个因癫痫病而落下病根的人,常披着深蓝色的布衣,带着黑色皮帽,头歪在一边,手又歪在一边,活像只奔跑的鸵鸟,大家都戏称他为“歪脖子”。

歪脖子看上去年近六十的模样,他说不了话,总是着急地咿呀着,面部表情奇怪地扭曲着,表达着他内心的挣扎。小时候他总是父母用来吓我的传说,就好像别的地方的父母给孩子说不听话会被大灰狼衔去一样,我们这里却是说,不听话歪脖子就会把你背去。从小看见他我便躲得远远的,唯恐被他背去那些不敢想象的恐怖地方。他呲牙咧嘴地笑着,一副自以为和善的模样,事实上在我心目中实打实是只魔鬼的样子。可随着年岁的长大,不经意间他在我心中渐渐变得和蔼起来。

曾记得我坐在家门口啃着亮晶晶的梨子,不知是谁家的孩子狠狠地往地上摔了下去,膝盖上立竿见影地往外流着殷红的血。我冷眼看着摔倒的小孩在我面前哇哇大哭,声音凄厉地穿过我的耳膜,而我和路边的人一样,依旧无动于衷,只因打小父母便教导别乱管闲事,免得赖在自己身上。远远的地方,歪脖子一摇一摆地走过来,我害怕得搬着凳子便往家里窜,只露出一只眼睛从窗户里看着,看他会不会把小孩背回家。小孩哭得更厉害了,拖着伤腿也要使劲往前逃,生怕晚一步就被捉去了。歪脖子脸上露出痛苦的表情,转过身一摇一摆地朝便利店走去。我紧张地看着他下一步的动作,他在店老板面前使劲地吼叫着。“这个?还是这个?”店老板也是吓了一跳,连忙指着货架上的东西说到。歪脖子还是吼着,让人一头雾水。后来他索性用膝盖往台阶上擦破了皮,用眼神看着伤口。店老板这才恍然大悟似的从抽屉里找出两张创可贴塞在他那双满是泥垢的手中,他这才摆动着身子让店老板从他脖子上挂的包里掏出皱巴巴的零钱,然后又摇晃着把创可贴丢在了小孩的旁边,扭着脖子走了。我突然觉得鼻子酸酸的,歪脖子在我心中也愈发伟大起来。

自此之后,我再看他呲着牙齿笑的表情,总是满怀敬佩地报以淡淡的微笑,心中再也没有害怕的感觉,只觉得他残破的身躯里仿佛有比这个世界上所有人都还要完整的精神。

作文600字带点评【四】

本文语言虽然并不华丽,但却极为准确生动,情感丰富而真实,读来津津有味。尤其小作者观察外公包饺子的步骤,观察得是细致入微,可见小作者是个细心的人。虽为一件小事,但作者却描述得有声有色,结尾处不可或缺的点晴之笔,较好地凸现了文章主题。

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