导入:
第1段:Recently we’ve had a discussion about whether we should... (导入话题
Our opinions are divided on this topic.(观点有分歧
正文:
第2段:Most of the students are in favour of it.(正方观点
Here are the reasons. First... Second... Finally...(列出2~3个赞成的理由
第3段:However, the others are strongly against it. (反方观点
Their reasons are as follows. In the first place... What’s more... In addition...(列出2~3个反对的理由
结论:
第4段:Personally speaking, the advantages overweigh the disadvantages, for it will do us more harm than good, so I support it.(个人观点 オ
1。 头绪分明,脉络清楚
写好记叙文,首先要头绪分明,脉络清楚,明确文章要求写什么。要对所写的事件或人物进行分析,弄清事件发生、发展一直到结束的整个过程,然后再收集选取素材。这些素材都应该跟上述五个“ W ”和一个“ H ”有关。尽管不是每篇记叙文里都必须包括这些“ W ”和“ H ”,但动笔之前,围绕五个“ W ”和“ H ”进行构思是必不可少的。
2。 突出中心,详略得当
在文章的框架确定后,对支持故事的素材的选取是很关键的。选材要注意取舍,应该从表现文章主题的需要出发,分清主次,定好详略。要突出重点,详写细述那些能表现文章主题的重要情节,略写粗述那么非关键的次要情节。面面俱到反而使情节罗列化,使人不得要领。这一点是写好记叙文要解决的一个基本问题,也需要一定的技巧。如:
One night a man came to our house and told me, "There is a family with eight children。 They have not eaten for days。" I took some food with me and went。
When I finally came to that family, I saw the faces of those little children disfigured (破坏外貌) by hunger。 There was no sorrow or sadness in their faces, just the deep pain of hunger。
I gave the rice to the mother。 She divided the rice in two, and went out, carrying half the rice。 When she came back, I asked her, "Where did you go?" she gave me this simple answer, "To my neighbors — they are hungry also!"
3。 用活语言,准确生动
记叙文要用具体的事件和生动的语言对人、事、物加以叙述。一篇好的记叙文的语言既要准确、生动,又要表现力强,这样才能把人、事描写得具体生动,其可读性才强。试比较下面一篇例文修改的前后效果。
原文:
One day Xiaoqiang was wandering away。 He was soon lost among people and traffic。 He could not find the way back home and started crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by found him standing alone in front of a shop and crying。 They went up to Xiaoqiang and asked him what had happened。 Xiaoqiang told them how he got lost and where he lived。 The two students decided to take him home。 Mother was pleased to see Xiaoqiang come back safe and sound。 She invited the two students into the house and gave them some money, but they didn't take it。 She served them with tea but they left。
修改后:
The other day, five-year-old Xiaoqiang left home alone and wandered happily in the street。 After some time, he felt hungry so he wanted to go back home。 But he found he was lost among the crowded people and heavy traffic。 When he could not find the way home, he started and crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by from school found him sanding crying in front of a shop。 They immediately went up to him。
"Little boy, why are you standing here crying?" they asked。
"I want Mom, I go home。" said the boy, still crying。
"Don't worry, we'll send you home。"
And they spent the next two hours looking for the boy's house。 With the help of a policeman, they finally found it。
When the worried mother saw her son come back safe and sound, she was so thankful and she invited the students into her house。 Gratefully, she offered them some money, saying it was a way to express her thanks, but the young students firmly refused it and left without even a cup of tea。
Last Sunday, Jim went out to fly a kite. The kite flew highly in the sky. Jim ran with it happily.
Suddenly the line was broken and the kite flew away. Soon it disappeared. Where was it?
Jim had no idea. So he had to run here and there to look for the kite. At last he saw it on the top of the tree. He tried to get it down. But he couldn’t. He felt sad.
透过窗户,阳光依旧明媚,天空悠荡着几缕如烟似的白云,清新的空气从打开的窗子外面一丝一丝地渗入这个并不宽大的办公室,深深地吸一口气,饱享这不多见的清新。一早上忐忑的心情也可以平息下来了,现在只要打电话向那个先生道谢就好了。
你从口袋里拿出一部粉白色的小手机,用右手的食指在按键上跳来跳去,把纸上的号码打在手机的银屏上,然后有左手的拇指按了那个画着绿色电话的按键,电话拨通了,响起一段悠扬的乐曲声,是kanon的声响,我记他的手机彩铃也是这段音乐,没错,肯定是他!
随着声响戛然而止,从手机的另一端传来一个中年男子亲切的声音:
“喂,是谁啊。”
“额,您好,您是不是曾把一位受伤的人送到医院,并为他付了医药费呢?”你略带些慌张,赶忙回答。
“嗯,是有这么个人,你是?”
“我是他的女儿,真要谢谢您呢,我们可以见一面吗?既可以当面向您道谢,还可以把医药费还给您。”
“医药费不用还了,那个我现在在上班,所以……”
还没等他说完,我一把从雪儿手里夺过手机,对着手机的另一端轻声说道:“请问您是不是鑫辰先生呢?”
“嗯,我是,那你是……”
“哼!什么嘛,身为一个父亲,你竟然听不出你女儿的声音,我宣布:你关荣下岗了。”我调皮的说道。
你站在我的旁边,听了我的说的话,非常吃惊的看着我。
“好了,爸爸,你先工作吧,不打扰你了,再见。”说完之后,我按下了红色的按钮,挂断电话。
“雅儿,那位就我爸爸的人是你的爸爸?”你的眼神你充满着不解与疑惑,迫不及待的问道。
“嗯,用一句话来形容,那就是这世界太小了,哈哈。”
话语伴着咯咯的笑声,回荡在整间屋子里。
“雅儿,我们回病房吧,说不定我爸爸已经醒了呢。”
“嗯,好的。”
我拉着你的手,走出办公室的门,顺着笔直的走廊,走到那个印象中的病房,轻轻地推开房门,走进去。
“女儿。”
你的爸爸醒了,只是说话的声音有些颤抖,饱含深情地凝视着你。你慢慢从我身后走过去,我这时一扭头,才注视到你脸上泪水划过的痕迹,顺着泪痕凝成一滴透明的泪滴,慢慢流向嘴角。
你猛的扑过去:“爸爸,”你哽咽着:“你怎么会伤成这样,是谁把你弄成这个样子的啊。”你的泪从脸颊上流下来,“滴答滴答”一滴一滴地浸透了白色微薄的床单。
“我……”你父亲的手轻轻地抚摸着你的头:“其实是我赌博欠别人的钱没有还,他们就叫人打我。小雪,好女儿,爸爸对不起你,让你担心了。”面对这样的女儿,或许是再也按奈不住泪水的肆虐,终于还是哭了出来。
“爸爸,你知道吗?是雅儿的父亲把您送到医院并为您付了医药费,我们应该好好的谢谢人家,还有,以后不要在赌博了好吗?”你用手擦去颊上的泪渍,轻声说道。
“嗯,爸爸答应你,以后再也不赌了。”你父亲凝光的眼神,慢慢移向我这里,我只好不好意思的扶着我头顶的几缕发丝,略带羞涩的说道:“没关系啦,雪儿是我最好的朋友,这样做也是应该的。”
“来,小姑娘,到这边来。”你招手,示意让我过去,我走到床的另一边,慢慢蹲下。
你父亲扎着针管的手,微微抬起,拍着我的肩膀:“好孩子呀,以后就拜托你多照顾小雪了。”声音中带着喜悦的味道。
“嗯,会的。”我非常坚定的说。
“哎?这扎针的这只手怎么有点疼啊。”你爸爸放下手,小声嘀咕。
“手疼?叔叔,您没事吧?雪儿,快去叫医生。”
“嗯。”你立马起身跑出去……
日子长长短短,一晃竟过了十数年。而那些温婉静好的时光,却在记忆里如初盛开,不谢朝暮,让我懂得往事并不如烟,旧日的风筝不曾断线。
那些好时光,你我曾共度,共享,共徜徉。
尚记得好时光里,戴着花料肚兜,连走路都是一摇三晃似的,我却依然乐此不疲地甘心做你的跟屁虫;蝴蝶、花草和吵闹的街市在眼前晃过,我却只顾寻觅你日渐苍蚀的背影;三岁时父母把我寄养在你家一个暑假,待他们来接我时,我却骄傲地躲进你的怀抱,扯着你的衣角向啼笑皆非的父母介绍:“这是我姥爷。”
五岁时,你让我住在你家,雕花大木桌如你的手掌般结实有力,老电视机旁的水仙长势喜人,温和而多情。在我作为一个孩童的记忆里,印象里你总是起得很早,等我睡眼朦胧从床上爬起,撒着葱末的豆腐脑和酥脆的油条已然在桌上撒发着幽微的热气,而你心满意足地坐在沙发上看报,待我故意攀到你的膝盖上把你陷入报纸的兴致打断时,你便用双手托起我,让我感到兴奋与高处的晕眩,再乐呵呵地把我放下,看我像小猫一样溜走;你总是充满暖意,陪我乐此不疲地玩些幼稚的把戏,我咯咯地笑,你也幸福地眉眼弯弯;你也总是那么稳妥,长时间不发一语,有种不经意的深沉,我却愿意时时缠着你,抚摸挂在床边的你买的地图,懵懂而认真地听你讲福建和台湾,你捧着我站在窗台,不厌其烦地教我指认这两个地名,当我有些迷茫却终于肯记读下来,你便高兴地向家人宣布这个“令人十足振奋的消息”,手舞足蹈像个孩子。
或者说,在那段去而不返的好时光里,你陪我,又成了一回孩子。
如若好时光如石砾般俯拾皆是,怀念或许便不会那么意味深长。年华白驹过隙,我还在愿与你共度好时光的甜梦里,你却终于在我的年华里缺席。
八岁那年,你病倒,近麦的肤色愈发黝黑,我在充斥着消毒水气味的病房里依旧不知实情的傻玩,以为那白色肃穆的地方只是你暂留的场所,以为大人脸上充满哀愁的神情只是烟火一现过往云烟,以为我依旧可以挽着你的`手,走过长长的巷子与街市……
而终究还是我错了。过往的不是伤痛而是你的生命,当母亲哽咽着告诉我你已不在,我依然没有理解其中悲恸的意义——不在,既永别。
年华岁岁更迭,转眼你已离开十一年,而与那段好时光一起消失在时间深处的,还有我侬软细语地称呼“姥爷”的资格。我终于知道了那个手掌宽阔,温和安详的你不会再推开家门唤我的乳名,我终于了解了我们血液里包含着怎样一种亲近;而你虽未等到我的青春年月,却在你生命的尾音、我人生的序曲谱下最强乐音;你,虽化作一颗天边的远星,却时时照亮我,让我懂得“好时光”的定义,留给我余生去回味、思量。
好时光,亲情长,与你同在。
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