长时间以来,人们普遍认为:中国的传统教育是不善于表扬和鼓励孩子,这使很多孩子缺乏自信,有不少教育专家就呼吁,要学会鼓励孩子!
于是,不知何时起,“无批评教育”成了大家共同膜拜的教育方式。老师被要求尊重学生,不准批评或变相地批评孩子;家长更是将这一理论发挥到极致,孩子稍有成就便大加赞扬,甚至有了错误也不敢批评,唯恐打消掉孩子的自信心,因为“树大自然直”吗,小时有点错误算不得什么。
但是,现在又出现了另一种极端:孩子说不得了。
孩子说不得了
“现在的孩子越来越不敢批评了。”一位在教育第一线奋斗了十几年的老班主任感慨道,她向笔者介绍了这样两个案例:
一、上课时,老师发现有一位学生拿着喷水器对着另一位学生不停地喷洒,老师很生气,于是批评了这位学生,并要没收他的喷水器。然而,让老师意想不到的事情发生了,这位同学竟然一声不吭走到自己的座位,拿起自己的喷水器使劲地往地上一扔,然后头也不回地走出教室,居然比老师的脾气还大……
二、一名女生没有完成作业,她的班主任简单地批评了几句,没想到中午这名女生就从学校“出走”了,下午班主任和学校领导陪着家长四处找她。
“经受不起挫折,这是现在孩子普遍存在的一个问题,而且年龄越小这个问题越突出。”长期从事中学生心理咨询工作的济南一中张桂薇老师感慨道。
“缺少批评是造成这一问题的`主要原因”,张老师接着分析,“当前独生子女生活条件优越、个性强、任性、心理承受能力较差。很多父母对孩子百依百顺,喜欢包办代替,孩子如果想要什么,家长必须立刻做到,这种缺少批评的教育方式所造成的后果就是许多学生经不起挫折和失败。”
缺少批评的教育是不完整的
“没有批评的教育是不完整的教育。”山东师范大学教育学博士王美芳教授分析道,“赏识和批评,就像鸟的两翼,缺一不可。每个学生都有可以赏识的地方,自然也有可批评之处。正确的赏识,可以给学生以极大鼓舞;恰当的批评,也会促使学生进步。孩子没有经历挫折“会变得脆弱异常”,因此,要让孩子的生活中有禁区,他们犯了错误要受到惩罚,要让孩子懂得有些规则是无法动摇的,有些过失是要自己承担后果的。”
王教授接着举了几个例子,如毁坏公私财物必须赔偿,作业不能及时完成就不能跟别人一样参加课外活动,值日不认真就该再来一次,无故逃学、旷课、迟到必须反省改正等等。只有让学生为自己的一言一行负责,才能让他明辨是非。如果一味“赏识”而不敢批评、不敢惩罚,只会扭曲学生的认识,是对学生的不负责。
批评要注意方式
一般来说,孩子获得了成功或犯错误的时候,恰恰是教育的最佳时机,这是需要大智慧的,要善于捕捉教育时机。专家认为,孩子易于接受的批评方式应当具有以下两个特点。一要充满爱心。教育的艺术是爱的艺术,作为教育手段之一的惩戒,与体罚、心罚截然不同。如果说一个教师要惩罚考试成绩差的学生,是因为这个学生的考分大大地拖了全班平均分,影响了教师的个人业绩,那么,无论这个教师采用何种教育手段,都是错误的。
二要因人而异。能被孩子接受的惩戒教育方式,必然是能针对学生实际、走入学生心灵的方式。比如,同样是犯一种性质的错误,对缺乏耐心的孩子可以罚拼七巧板,对缺乏亲情的罚写一封家书,对不爱体育活动的罚跑步等等。
我最亲爱的宝贝:
翻开日历,见到用红色记号笔赫然圈出的那个日子,我几乎不敢相信——宝贝,你真的十岁了!
是啊!掌心还未把你捧够,就捧不下了;怀里还未把你抱够,就抱不动了。记忆中牙牙学语、蹒跚学步的样子还那么清晰,转瞬间,你都十岁了!
夜晚你熟睡之时,我掌灯凝望着你的面容。何时,那圆滚滚的脸庞,已然划出些许刚毅的棱角?何时,那粉扑扑的面颊,已然显出些许沉稳的神色?何时,那平展展的眉宇,已然露出些许凝思的川纹?一日日地望着你,奈何未曾发觉,你已不再是妈妈怀里厮磨撒欢的蓬头稚子,而是一个会思考有主见能担当的小男子汉了。
儿子,虽然妈妈还深深眷恋着记忆中那个天真稚嫩的你。但对眼前这个聪明淘气的你,更是倍感自豪。你聪颖却不自傲,调皮但却听话。妈妈会一直记得,这个美丽的夜晚,餐桌边,烛光里,你双手合十,虔诚而又热切地许下了自己的十岁愿望。睡前,枕边,你对我耳语:你的愿望,就是要尽自己的力量,让世界更美好。宝贝,你知道吗?这一刻,你让妈妈,感觉到了自己的渺小与狭隘。
你对我说,你还有很多具体的目标:想造出可以治愈任何癌症的药,想造出可以让妈妈不那么容易老的药;你还想去看看,海到底有多深,天到底有多高;地心是否都是岩浆,宇宙是否真的无限……宝贝,你是个多么博爱而奋进的孩子!妈妈希望,你永远怀有这样的热情,对人生有着梦想与规划。但妈妈也希望你能明白,理想与现实是有距离的。如何怀揣梦想,在人生的道路上保持本性,不忘初心,更是妈妈在你十岁成长礼上需要告诫你的训言。
XXX
20XX年XX月XX日
I read the Chinese version of “Camille” a few years ago. At that time I was deeply moved by the main character Marguerite Gautier. “Camille” or “The Lady of the Camellias” by Alexandre Dumas, fils, is the story of Marguerite Gautier, a young courtesan, or kept woman, in Paris in the mid 1800's, and how she falls in love with a young man, Armand Duval, and then tries to escape from her questionable past. Unfortunately, it comes back to haunt her and she ends up returning to that life and dies painfully and alone, but with the knowledge that she was a noble woman at heart. When I first began to read the book, I did not care for Marguerite or her attitude or lifestyle, but as I got further into the narrative, I realized that her saucy attitude was a front to cover the lonely woman that she really was. She felt used, abused and unloved, until the gentle Armand Duval came into her life and showed her that he loved her as a person and not for what she could do for him. It must have taken great courage for Marguerite to leave the life she had lived for so long, knowing all along that it was probably too good to be true and would not last indefinitely. And it also showed that Marguerite really loved Armand Duval for she could even change herself for him.
However, happiness didn’t last for long. When M. Duval, Armand's father, came to her, pleading for her to leave Armand to save both Armand's reputation and that of his younger innocent sister, Marguerite saw a way to become pure of heart, if not in body. She felt that it was her duty, because she loved Armand so much, to do this even though it meant giving up her own happiness and hurting Armand temporarily. She reluctantly returned to her former life, knowing that.some day Armand would forgive her. Sadly, she died in debt and basically alone, except for her one female friend, Julie Duprat, who helped her during her illness. She had her journal sent to Armand after her death, explaining why she had made the choices she had. I think Dumas's last few lines about Marguerite being the exception, not the rule were quite true, and I also agreed with his view that while her lifestyle could not be condoned, we as a society assume that all of these type of women are cold and heartless, while this may not always be the case. A person can make the wrong choices in life when they are young, and try to redeem themselves, but sometimes past situations prevent them from changing their lives, even though they desperately wish to do so. This applies to both men and women in many different types of circumstances: involvement in crime; drug or alcohol abuse; gambling; prostitution; financial problems; poor marriage choices; etc. And this is the fact, which exists in the whole society.
As far as the other characters in the book, I think Marguerite was right in saying that no one truly cared about her, but only wanted something from her, the only exceptions being Armand and Julie Duprat. Of course, the Comte de G. and Comte de N. wanted her body and appearance. The
Duke needed to “wake up and smell the coffee” and realize that she could never replace his dead daughter. If he truly cared, he could have helped her leave her lifestyle without “keeping” her himself. And lastly, Prudence was a blood-sucking leech who used Marguerite almost worse than the men. I also think she was jealous of the fact that Marguerite had so much more courage than herself and someone truly loved her.
Last morning, when tiding my bookshelf, I took this book out of the shelf, and a dried flower flew away from the book. It was pale blue, very transparent, with thin fine veins. a dried flower flew away from the book. It was pale blue, very transparent, with thin fine veins. I held it against the morning light and blew on it. The soft breeze carried it away. Camille is just like the camellia, she could never escape from the destiny of withering. But it wasn’t her fault; it’s because of the evil of Capitalism and the hideousness of that society.
Suddenly, I remembered a saying: “Women are like the flowers”. Those pretty women are like those beautiful flowers; their delicate beauty makes people feel they are the miracle of life. However, even the God envies their beauty. It seems that beautiful women always have tragic endings. As we are normal persons, even we can see the hideousness of humanity that results in their fate of withering, we can at most ask quietly in our hearts: Where have those beautiful flowers gone? Where have they gone?
The Life And Adventures Of Robinson Crusoe
It seemed to be such a coincidence that the night after I finished reading The Life And Adventures Of Robinson Crusoe, I was to dine in a restaurant distinctly related to the book itself. This restaurant was no other than the famous American-styled “Friday ’s. ” The reason for mentioning this restaurant is quite straightforward to all the gentlemen, ladies and children who have read the novel and enjoyed it, which is the fact that this restaurant was, most likely, named after the American Native in Robinson Crusoe, called Friday. This restaurant offers very exceptional service, for instance when the waitresses are asked to order dishes they kneel rather than stand, which, unlike the other restaurants I have been to, makes it easier for the customers to hear them speak. Moreover, Friday’s friendly services to the customers help them to make better choices when ordering dishes. I remembered when I went to Friday ’s last time; the waitress kindly described the items on the menu with precise details. It turned out that the combo I initially wanted was designed to be shared among a large group, not to be eaten by one person. I think this restaurant shows many commendable features similar to that of Friday. Friday brought emotional warmth to the people around him with his appealing personality. I think it was this personality that affected Crusoe and made him say that he loved Friday when Crusoe didn ’t express love for his parents, brothers, sisters, or even his wife. “When he espied me, he came running to me, laying himself down again upon the ground, with all the possible signs of an humble, thankful disposition, making many antic gestures to show it to let me know how he would serve me as long as he lived.” This was what Friday did after Crusoe had rescued him from the two savages chasing him. It was easy for me to see why Crusoe had loved Friday. After sometime, Crusoe and Friday were to rescue Friday’s father. When Friday reunited with his father, the scene was easy to move anyone: “It would have moved anyone to tears to have seen how Friday kissed him, embraced him, hugged him, cried, laughed, halloed, jumped about, danced,
sung; and then sung and jumped about again, like a distracted creature. It was a good while before I could make him speak to me.” This is my favourite chapter in the whole book. It is hard to see why Friday is an ex-savage when he can have personalities more praiseworthy than many civilized people, viz. Crusoe himself. “When he (Friday went to him (Friday’s father, he would sit down by him, open his breast, and hold his father’s head close to his bosom, half an hour together, to nourish it; then he took his arms and ankles, which were numbed and stiff with the binding, and rubbed them with his hands.” Furthermore, Friday’s expression of loyalty in asking Crusoe to kill him rather than leave him is more heartfelt than anything Crusoe ever says or does.
Crusoe, on the absolute contrary, seems incapable of deep feelings, as shown by his account of leaving his family—he never shows any emotions. After a moving lecture from Robinson’s father about his future, he still decided to follow his own wandering ambition. Careless was he about the wishes of his parents to keep him alive and prosperous, as he was the only child left in the family. When he came back from the island which he had lived on for twenty eight years, he found that it had been too late to tell his parents that he was still alive, but yet again he did not feel sorry for them; he also did not feel sorry for the two people who had to live in misery for nearly thirty years under the allusion all of their sons were dead. He had the same feelings for his wife: when he was married, he said it was “not either to my disadvantage or dissatisfaction”, implying that it was also neither to his advantage nor his satisfaction. Moreover, after his wife died, Robinson did not think of looking after the three children they had, but went back to the island, which he had lived on for twenty-eight years. It was on this trip which Robinson Crusoe revisited “His Island ” as he called it. I feel that Robinson ’s indifference to his family is almost emotionally cruel.
Before had clearly shown the contrast between Crusoe’s and Friday’s personalities, as when Friday, in his joyful reunion with his father, displayed far more emotion toward his family members than Crusoe, whereas Crusoe never mentions missing his family or dreams about the happiness of seeing them again. I think Defore is very successful in introducing Friday as part of the novel, it makes the whole novel seem much more complete and gripping to the reader, as well as proving that Defoe’s ideology of racism is civilized unlike many other Europeans at that time; natives and savages are not worse than others but can perhaps even be more modern and civilized. Those are the reasons of why I like The Life And Adventures Of Robinson Crusoe and Friday.
或许是我习惯了这样散漫而满足的生活,从来没有考虑到别人的感受,一直这样很自我的过着,写给爸妈的一封信 生活和人生的感悟。打电话给爸爸妈妈,听到他们的声音很开心,很有安全感。告诉他们我的烦恼,我的不开心,总是能在爸爸那找到安慰,然后被妈妈泼冷水。他们说我怎么还像个孩子一样长不大?呵呵…我喜欢在你们面前耍赖,因为只有你们对自己的孩子才是最真实的。我承认我一直是个溺爱中的孩子,永远都不知道站在别人的角度想问题,而且还要求别人按照我的意愿走。
听着抱抱说着他内心深处的种种,有些惊讶有些不知所措。或许这次真的是我错了。第一次,第一次这么大的感触到自己是多么的幼稚。
我在想,是不是每个人的价值观不一样才会导致每个人的人生观的不一样。我知道抱抱是个很懂事的男生,知道他是个很孝顺的孩子,知道他是个很稳重的男人。我从来都没有怀疑过他的能力和潜能。至少我无条件的相信他,相信自己不会看错人,相信他即使没有一些人的背景以后一样可以做的很好,很好。真的。但是他需要一个跳板。对,跳板。就像千里马需要遇见伯乐一样。
是的,我没办法体会到成长过程中他与我差异迥然的童年,但是从他的话中我感触到了那些无法掩饰的悲伤,心得体会《写给爸妈的一封信 生活和人生的感悟》。我不知道用什么样的辞藻形容我的心情。其实有时候我挺羡慕的,因为他总是说乡里怎么怎么,在我的印象中,乡下就是奶奶家,有池塘,有稻田,有清凉的井水,有小鸟昆虫,有石板桥,有很大很大的桔园的地方,小时候一放暑假就很向往的地方,一住就是两个月的小村庄。每个人对每一个事物的看法不一样,造成了我们印刻在心里的观念不同。
或许我改好好整理一下我自己。同样生活在一个消费层次的小城市中,生活在一个物质需求的学校中,为什么我始终要把眼睛放得那么高,看不到站在物质下面的同学们。无休止的挥霍导致了我习惯这样的生活,认为这样是我的生活模式,这么大了,一直没有想过改变什么,因为从小到大,我的朋友,我的圈子大家都是一样的,没有什么差别,所以我跳不出这个圈子看到外面的生活。
谢谢你,谢谢你,让我明白了,爸爸妈妈的钱是每天辛辛苦苦挣回来的,他们无条件的满足我的所有是希望我能在好的外在条件下健康快乐的成长,我没有资格任意的挥霍他们的所有,没有资格认为他们是我的爸爸妈妈为我做下的一切都是应该的。没有资格认为这一切都是理所当然。听着抱抱说的话,觉的心酸,但却庆幸,庆幸在我19岁这一年遇到这样一个男孩子,谢谢你,谢谢你教我如何爱别人,教会我成长。谢谢。谢谢抱抱。
接下来我们生活该如何演绎?
This is a story about a special and unreserved woman who has been exposed to a hostile environment but continuously and fearlessly struggling for her ideal life. The story can be interpreted as a symbol of the independent spirit.
It seems to me that many readers’ English reading experience starts with Jane Eyer. I am of no exception. As we refer to the movie “Jane Eyer”, it is not surprising to find some differences because of its being filmized and retold in a new way, but the spirit of the novel remains----to be an independent person, both physically and mentally.
Jane Eyer was a born resister, whose parents went off when she was very young, and her aunt,the only relative she had,treated her as badly as a ragtag. Since Jane’s education in Lowwood Orphanage began, she didn’t get what she had been expecting——simply being regarded as a common person, just the same as any other girl around. The suffers from being humiliated and devastated teach Jane to be persevering and prize dignity over anything else.As a reward of revolting the ruthless oppression, Jane got a chance to be a tutor in Thornfield Garden. There she made the acquaintance of lovely Adele and that garden’s owner, Rochester, a man with warm heart despite a cold face outside. Jane expected to change the life from then on, but fate had decided otherwise: After Jane and Rochester fell in love with each other and got down to get marry, she unfortunately came to know in fact Rochester had got a legal wife, who seemed to be the shadow following Rochester and led to his moodiness all the time ----Rochester was also a despairing person in need of salvation. Jane did want to give him a hand, however, she made up her mind to leave, because she didn’t want to betray her own principles, because she was Jane Eyer. The film has finally got a symbolist end: Jane inherited a large number of legacies and finally returned. After finding Rochester ’s misfortune brought by his original mad wife, Jane chose to stay with him forever.
I don’t know what others feel, but frankly speaking, I would rather regard the section that Jane began her teaching job in Thornfield as the film’s end----especially when I heard Jane’s words “Never in my life have I been awaken so happily. ” For one thing, this ideal and brand-new beginning of life was what Jane had been imagining for long as a suffering person; for another, this should be what the audiences with my views hoped her to get. But the professional judgment of producing films reminded me to wait for a totally different result: There must be something wrong coming with the excellence----perhaps not only should another section be added to enrich the story, but also we may see from the next transition of Jane’s life that “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you would get.”
What ’s more, this film didn’t end when Jane left Thornfield. For Jane Eyer herself, there should always be somewhere to realize her great ideal of being independent considering her fortitude, but for Rochester, how he can get salvation? The film gives the answer tentatively: Jane eventually got back to Rochester. In fact, when Jane met Rochester for the first time, she scared his horse and made his heel strained, to a certain extent, which meant Rochester would get retrieval because of Jane. We can consider Rochester’s experiences as that of religion meaning. The fire by his frantic wife was the punishment for the cynicism early in his life. After it, Rochester got the mercy of the God and the love of the woman whom he loved. Here we can say: human nature and divinity get united perfectly in order to let such a story accord with the requirements of both two sides. The value of this film may be due to its efforts to explore a new way for the development of humanism under the faith of religion.
看完某一作品后,一定有不少感悟吧,需要写一篇观后感好好地作记录了。那么你真的会写观后感吗?以下是小编为大家收集的对高中生有帮助的《解忧杂货店》观后感800字范文,仅供参考,大家一起来看看吧。
写这篇读书笔记,已经是看完《解忧杂货店》几个月之后的事了,故事情节已经记不太全了,人名也几乎全忘记了,但还是拼命回忆,尽量将全部的感触记录下来。
《解忧杂货店》是一本感动到落泪的治愈佳作。阅读过程中,好几次眼泪都差点掉下来。小说围绕杂货店与幼稚园(原谅我名字记不得了,将跨越三十年的人和物联系起来,感动、温馨的故事穿越时空,温暖了所有人的心。三个逃亡的少年也因此从偏离轨道的歧路上离开,重新步入正轨。小说中,追逐梦想的音乐家、在恋人和梦想之间摇摆的运动员、不得不与全家人踏上逃亡之路的少年……每个人都因为杂货店的“解忧”,抛开迷茫,获得了坚持下去的动力,重新燃起了生活下去的希望。原以为东野圭吾只是擅长写推理小说,读完才发现自己的视野太狭隘了,这本治愈系的社会小说绝对是一本不可多得的佳作。大师果然是大师,无论什么时候都能带给我们不一样的惊喜。
小说围绕着与陌生人的联系展开,通过对逆境中的陌生人的鼓励、支持、帮助,自己也获得向上的力量。在如今这个冷漠无情的时代,与陌生人相遇时,我们都无话可谈,仿佛我们生存在了一个冰冷无情、不关心他人的社会中。我们偶尔会认为自己与这个世界格格不入,没有人关心自己。但《解忧杂货店》向我们传递了没有人是孤独的这样一个主题。在这部小说中,我们看到了陌生人之间的`脉脉温情,看到了冰冷社会中那一股股温暖人心的热量。是的,我们总会在世界的某个角落,与陌生人相依相伴,相互鼓励,相互安慰,获得坚持下去的希望和力量。
我最爱的推理日剧《相棒》里的主人公杉下警部曾对犯人这样说过:“你觉得在这个世界上真的有与任何人都没有联系的人吗?有些时候可能就连我们自己也没注意到,我们所有人都在某个地方鼓励着他人,也被其他人鼓励着,人,不就是这样的吗?”这段话用来作为《解忧杂货店》的主题,再合适不过了。五仁君的读书笔记名为“每个人都不是一座孤岛”,也正是这样的意思。日剧《为了N》中的一位医生对女主说:“人不可能在不给别人带去悲痛的情况死去,就像人活着不可能不给别人带来痛苦一样。”换个角度说,人只要活着,和他人的羁绊就不可能断开,只是我们可能没有注意到。所以没有绝对的孤独,人和人之间也总会有温暖感人的故事,在温暖着我们的回忆,修复我们那颗在尘世挣扎中变得千疮百孔的心。这些温暖是我们生存下去的动力。就算世界充满荒凉、遍布荆棘,我们也总会在某个地方感受到温暖。
“我从未读过这样的小说。”这是很多看完这本书的人最大的感受。小说的结构和主题都出人意料。读完第一个故事后,我简单地以为后面每个故事都会以和第一个故事相似的模式展开,然后不断地读下去,不断地令我惊讶。每个故事的呈现方式都不尽相同,解忧的人也各不相同,第一人称、第三人称交错使用,三十年前、三十年后时空穿梭,眼前仿佛铺展开了一个纷繁复杂的世界,这或许就是小说的魅力。读完小说,好想自己也写一封信,在那个特定的时间,投到杂货店的信箱中,是不是我也能获得一些鼓舞人心、不断向前的动力呢?
守住心中的梦想,想着世界的某个角落有人在牵挂、鼓励着我们,那么无论什么样的风雨,我们都能大笑着奔跑前进了!
Dear parents,
“You always say that I am naive. In your eyes, I am always the little girl who will never grow up”. This is my favorite song and also the sound from the bottom of my heart. You made me feel so lucky to be your child. But I find our hearts getting further apart as time goes by.
You strictly forbid me to do entertaining activities even if I finished my homework, such as watching TV or playing computer games. Based on this, I couldn’t get any grade less than A. Its said that genius only means hard-working all one’s life. But I think combining exertion is the best way for learning.
The most important thing to me was that I feel frustrated for having few friends to confide in due to your strict rules. I can’t have a play date, participate in a school play or even choose my own extracurricular activities. Who will accept such a boring and troublesome person? I am just an ordinary girl who can’t stand loneliness, so I always feel contradictory.
On the one hand, I’m grateful to have you in my life, to disappoint you was the least I would do. On the other hand, what you asked for me made me felt like a puppet rather than a real person. I appreciated your efforts to pull me away from a self-indulgent life, but your obsessively extravagant strictness has pushed me into an isolated and insensible one. I need a little freedom so that I will concentrate on something I really interested in.
Father and mother, these words were hid in my deep heart for a long time. I love you, and I believe if you change some harsh rules. I will have a wonderful life.
Best wishes.
Yours, daughter
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