此类段落不论字数多少,都给人空虚的感觉。考生往往为了凑足篇幅而“不择手段”。表面看来扩展了许多,但仔细永远只有一个意思。不得不让考官觉得即单调又啰嗦。
尊敬的多莫斯设计学院(Doumus Academy教授:
你好!我叫李xx,是广州服装设计师协会的主席、广州时尚周(Guangzhou Fashion Week的执行主席、纺织服装专业的副教授。我非常高兴地向你推荐我的学生会员冯xx,并且相信它能够出色的完成在贵校(Doumus Academy服装设计硕士课程的学习。
在20xx年x月举行的广州时尚周(Guangzhou Fashion Week期间,由广州美术学院(GuangZhou Academy of Fine Arts向我推荐冯xx同学,我安排了冯xx同学参加时尚周的时装发布后台的模特、化妆、服装管理的组织工作,冯xx担任一个小组的组长,她成功优秀的组织了五个时装品牌发布会的后台工作, 充分体现冯xx同学的个性稳重、具高度责任感,工作积极主动、独立工作能力强,愿意在压力下工作,专业素质好。鉴于冯xx同学的优秀表现,她是被广州服装设计师协会吸收的唯一的在校大学生专业会员。
我已从事服装大学教育xx年,在广州大学纺织服装学院和科技学院担任副院长xx年,过去五年来,我指导过大约400名学生的独立研究项目。五年来,我每年两个假期带40名服装专业的实习生,他们都参与广州的大型服装品牌的产品设计开发,担任设计助理,包括前期调查、市场分析、面辅料和色彩策划、产品设计、工艺的分析、成衣的拍摄、服装服饰的.陈列设计。冯xx同学自20xx年起跟随我的研究项目,她对色彩、面辅料的市场把握度很高,设计作品与品牌理念保持一致,她的设计思想活跃、创新精神尤佳,尤其在服装服饰的陈列设计、饰品和饰物的设计开发方面有超越传统的能力,并在市场得到了验证。她对服装材料研究,对色彩、品牌文化和设计元素的整合应用总是能提出创新的观点。冯xx同学是我从教从业20多年极其少见的独具设计天赋和潜力的优秀学生。偶尔地,她的坚韧和坚持会变成固执,但通常她都性格很好,头脑也很冷静。
我知道多莫斯设计学院(Domus Academy,一所被称为后工业化时代欧洲最著名的设计学院。中国的经济在高速发展,中国政府在大力的扶持创意产业,中国服装业从以前的来料加工到现在变成现在的有自主创新设计品牌的时期,很需要国际化的人才。
我竭力向贵院推荐冯xx同学,我希望贵校能给她一个机会,让她在贵校严谨的学风和良好的学习环境中继续发挥她的特长,进一步提高专业知识,拓宽视野。望贵校考虑她的申请。
如需要了解冯xx同学的更多的情况,请随时和我联系,或给我发电子邮件,我的个人邮箱:xxxxxx@163.com
谢谢!
写作我也一直不差,因为以前背过新概念的一些文章。雅思的其实想要提高也不是难事,我买了一本《雅思万能八分作文》,还不错,里面有很多句子值得借鉴;然后我看了一些从3G上下载的范文,又从里面挑了一些句子和表达;在最后一天的时候,把我挑的句子和表达都罗列在一起,大概也就50条左右,我背了一下,接着就计时练了一次,结果在规定时间内直接写超了,TASK1写了200多,TASK2写了350,当时把我吓了一跳,因为我怕考试的时候按这样的思路写这么多时间会不够。所以在考试的时候,我写的比较慢,控制好节奏,每句话都是想好了再下笔的,最后字数差不多。
建议:1,一定要看一定数目的
虽然来源于身边社会,但不可让描述方式变的太鸡毛蒜皮,拿不上台面。其实这点非常容易办到,只需要把事件中某一个具体的你,我,他,变成是客观群体,比如说people across the globe, students, they之类的人称即可。
举例的常见表达方式:
for example,/for instance,(后加句子)
Such as/ like (后加词组)
Take... as an example,
A case in point is that......
其次,在举例时还应注意尺度。
1. 应避免使用第一人称和第二人称,为了加强客观性,应将人称写成第三人称。
改正:Those people who raise pets, such as dogs and cats, are more likely to gain happiness and relieve their loneliness.(那些养宠物,例如养猫和养狗的人往往更容易获得快乐并且缓解孤独感)
2. 应避免引用一项调查研究,并同时伴有过多数据。应将数据去掉,用含糊的方法表示。
改正:There is much evidence to show that the number of people smoking has increased at an alarming rate in China. (大量证据表明。。。)
3. 应避免将例子局限在一个国家,尤其是中国。应将范围放至全世界。
改正:Many children around the world like to sit in front of the screen for a long time, leading to their poor eyesight.(在全世界,许多孩子在屏幕前待太久,导致了他们的视力减弱。
“全世界”的表达方式:around the world, all over the world, across the globe
【写作真题】The advocates of international aid believe that countries have a moral obligation to help each other, while the opponents consider it necessary, because money is misspent by the governments that receive it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
【名师献计】This aid is essential to the homeless and useful in helping recipient countries return to their normal state after major disturbances. For example, with the humanitarian relief obtained worldwide on an annual basis, victims of natural disasters (such as tsunami, drought, flood throughout the world can recover rapidly and rebuild their homeland.
一个国家同样难代表世界。雅思是international的考试,不应将范围框的太局限。此外考官来自各个国家,过分使用一个国家的例子会引起他们的反感。
例:Many children in China like to play computer games for a long time, leading to their poor eyesight.
只需小小改动便可成为成功范例。
因此,首先考生应了解,举例是一种常见的论述方式,特别在论述某一些比较抽象的话题的\'时候(比如文化类或跟艺术相关的话题)。但是,并不是每个段落都需要例证法,举例过多或过分牵强会影响文章的正式感,甚至给考官喋喋不休的感觉。
举例是为了更加形象地叙述事情。朗阁海外考试研究中心提醒考生们要注意以下原则:
不能过于空洞,也不能脱离现时,否则就失去了举例的意义。
2. Many schools demand the students wear uniforms. Some people think that such a practice can undermine their personality and individuality. What is your opinion?
3. Some people believe that pet animals such as cats and dogs cannot be kept in the cities, especially in busy modern cities. Do you agree or disagree?
4. Nowadays, teenagers cause a lot of social problems due to lack of discipline. Some people think that parents should spend more time staying with their children. Do you agree or disagree?
5. Nowadays, many children have their part-time jobs. Some people say that doing part-time jobs is useful, but others argue that children should enjoy their childhood. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
6. Some people think if students want to learn a foreign language, it is advisable for them to learn it in the native countries where the language is actually spoken. Whats your opinion? Give your reasons.
7. In some countries, there are women taking the positions of police officers, while some people believe that women are not suitable to work in the police force. DO you agree or disagree? Write your reasons and give examples in your experience.
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