【习作题目】
Students Grading of Their Teachers
1.学生给老师打分已很普遍;
2.人们对其持不同态度(肯定或否定的态度);
3.你的看法。
【习作解读】
显然,此任务是写一篇议论文,主题为对学生给老师打分的现象进行议论,开放性较大。学生应根据实际情况,从多个方面阐述其原因并表达自己对这种现象的观点和态度。该话题更加贴近学生的实际生活,但有一定的语言难度,也有一定的思想深度。通过此文的写作,也从侧面提示了学生在注重写作基础训练的前提下,也应该注重培养积极思考、灵活运用、自由发挥等能力。
此次的写作任务出题相当巧妙,写作内容涉及的词汇和句型都属于新课程标准范围。题目在考查学生写作能力的同时,也在考查学生的分析判断能力及高度概括能力。富有想象力的学生写出的文章可能生动而富有灵性。此题目能引发学生对平日习以为常的行为进行反思,学会换位思考,这对中学生的性格和品德培养非常重要。
【习作展示】
Students Grading of Their Teachers
Nowadays, a lot of schools ask their students to contribute to grading their teachers. As a teacher, it is their responsibility to satisfy their students in all aspects. Meanwhile, it is admirable that school teachers prefer to expose themselves to their students.
If the system of grading of teachers by students is introduced, it will benefit students, teachers and the administration of the school for a number of reasons. For one thing, the system will give teachers and the administration of the school an insight into the minds of the students and show whether the teachers are successful in getting their lessons understood by the students; for another, it will also encourage the good teachers to continue their efforts and motivate themselves. What is more, it will expose those who are not doing enough and will lead them to correct their teaching methods as well as their attitude towards students. Thus the quality of teaching will certainly improve.
In a word, it is a promising concept and will bring surprisingly good results if applied with the right conditions.
【习作点评】
作者观点明确,赞成学生给老师打分。作为老师,就要做一个让学生满意的老师。这样,不仅对学生、学校有利,而且对老师本人也有利。这样,老师就会从另一个角度重新审视自己,看自己是否是一个成功的老师。如果得到学生的认可,这将是对自己的一次鼓励,为继续前行增添动力。如果学生的认可度不高,老师就应进行反思,调控教学方法和教学态度。这样,教学质量肯定会提高。作
者用简洁、明快的语言以及自己的经历列举了充分的论据,内容充实,贴近生活。For one thing, for another, what is more, in a word等过渡词的使用,是短文结构清晰,层次分明。最后,最值得一提的是,文中多次正确运用的高级词汇和复杂句式,给文章增添了不少文采。综上所述,这是一篇不可多得的佳作,值得向大家推荐。
二、写作模板
此模板适用于社会现象类议论文。参考模式如下:
Nowadays, there exists an increasingly serious social/economic/environmental There are a couple of reasons behind this problem/phenomenon. For one ;Based on the above discussions, I can easily forecast that more and more people
Nowadays, there exists a common phenomenon—with the development of the Internet, more and more people tend to send electronic cards instead of paper ones to their friends and relatives when an important holiday comes.
There are a couple of reasons behind this phenomenon. For one thing, compared with the traditional cards, electronic cards are more lively and interesting. They can give not only pictures but also sound and animation. For another, there are many websites online which offer varieties of cards for you to choose from. What is more, with the popularity of the electronic cards, less paper is used in making paper cards, which does good to our environment.
Based on the above discussions, I can easily forecast that sending greetings by using electronic cards will be accepted by more and more people, not only the young ones.
三、写作指导
写作思路是先列出一个具体的社会问题或者现象,然后分析产生的原因和产生的影响,最后提出解决问题的办法,或者得出结论,或者提出个人看法,或者预测前景。
论点、论据、论证是议论文的三要素。论点是作者对所议论问题所持有的见解和主张,论据是用来证明论点的事实和道理的根据;论证是用论据来证明论点的方法和过程。一般来说,议论文每段都有主题句来确定论点。论证的方法很多,但最常用的是因果分析法。即:分析事实与论点的因果关系,指出取得结果的原因是所要证明的论点,从而达到论证的目的。
在近几年的高考中,议论文的比重占得越来越多,议论文的.出题形式可以多种多样,有看图写作、图表、表格、书信等各种类型,但文体实际是议论文,而有时是夹叙的议论文。议论文的写作要点是:
1. 观点鲜明,文章一定有一个明确的中心论点。
2. 层次分明,一个中心论点通常有几个分论点支持,不同层次之间要分明,过渡清晰自然。
3. 最后一段一般要总结全文,得出一个符合逻辑的结论,突出中心思想。
4. 一般采用一般现在时。
5. 语言简洁有力,一般不采用口语。
四、巩固练习
1.【练习题目】
2010年上海世界博览会期间,上万的青年志愿者参加志愿工作,请你谈谈对此现象的看法。
【参考范文】
During the period of holding the 2010 World Expo in Shanghai, tens of thousands of young citizens are participating in volunteer work, hoping to devote themselves to the grand occasion. As far as I am concerned, everyone ought to enter for it. Here are the reasons I want to mention.
It can be argued that the advantages of doing unpaid volunteer work are enormous, because volunteer work is actually a two-way street. First of all, volunteer work should always benefit people who need help. Those who need help will feel happier due to our immediate help. On the other hand, as far as the young people ourselves are concerned, we have more opportunities to develop the sense of responsibility, independence as well as interpersonal skills in the process of helping others.
Through this kind of work, we become confident and mature. In addition, we can make many friends and increase our chances of getting the jobs of our dreams. Furthermore, volunteer work plays an active role in building up a harmonious society.
In a word, it is of great value for the young adults to offer volunteer work. The youth volunteers do make a difference by the voluntary work! Why not join them and do something for our country?
2.【练习题目】
某些中学生为了显示自己成熟或表明自己醋而吸烟。请写一篇120词左右的短文,列举吸烟的危害,并提出建议。
【参考范文】
I am sorry to know that more and more middle school students begin to smoke. I think it is wrong to believe that smoking is cool and even think that smoking makes you appear to be mature. In fact, smoking is not cool but very dangerous.
First, smoking can do much damage to health. Scientific researches show that smoking can lead to heart diseases, cancers and other problems. It is reported that about 5 million people die of diseases related to smoking each year all over the world.
Second, it is a waste of money to smoke cigarettes. Smoking can cost a great deal of money. Once you are addicted to it, it is difficult to give it up.
What’s more, smoking can cause fires easily, which may do great damage to your life and your surroundings.
So give up smoking at once! Only in this way can you keep healthy forever.
3. 【练习题目】近年来,越来越多的中学生出国学习,出现了所谓的中学生“出国热”。请根据以下提供的信息,谈谈自己的看法。
1)良好的语言环境,更利于语言学习。
2)拓宽视野,学习国外先进的科学技术。
3)传播各民族间的不同文化。
参考词汇:媒介,中间人:mediator
【参考范文】
In recent years, studying abroad has been popular. Tens of thousands of Chinese middle school students have gone to foreign countries to study.Many people are trying their best to apply to go abroad.
There are a number of reasons for attending schools abroad.First, students who are studying abroad can act as mediators between people of different cultures. They can communicate with each other directly and learn about different cultures. Second, they can learn much more advanced knowledge of science and technology from foreign countries and experience different education methods.Third, they live in foreign countries and take classes given by foreign teachers. As a result, they can learn foreign languages much more quickly.
Therefore, it is advisable to attend schools abroad.
4.【练习题目】随着经济和社会的发展,道路上的私人小汽车越来越多。请根据自己的观察和理解,谈谈自己的观点。
【参考范文】
With the fantastic development both in economy and in society in China, the number of people who own private cars is on the rise. Some people have bought cars of their own, and others are planning to buy cars. But I strongly object to the increase in developing private cars.
I hold that automobiles will give rise to a series of problems. In the first place, as more and more cars are produced and run on the road, a large volume of poisonous gas will be given off, polluting the atmosphere and causing actual harm to the health of people. Next, private cars contribute to traffic jams so greatly that the advantages gained in comfort and freedom are often cancelled out by the frustration caused by traffic jams. The last problem is the increasing number of car accidents that have killed and will kill a lot of people in a friction of a second.
In a word, although automobiles have been playing a vital part in the daily activities of our society, they also bring us numerous troubles such as more serious environmental pollution, more traffic accidents and more energy consumption. They drink up huge amounts of fuel and throw out huge amounts of pollutants. Jams waste our precious time. Therefore, I am against developing private cars.
你发如雪,映入了眼帘,你无私,苍老了谁?
——题记
早晨,外面小林里传出欢快悦耳的鸟叫声。
昨晚,母亲嚷嚷着要洗头,便被我制止了:“妈,太晚了,不要洗了,不然导致头痛就不好了。”母亲总是这样,处处为我们操心,却总不顾自己的身体。
早晨,母亲又想起了昨晚的事。便弯下身拿脸盆,站起来时还不忘用手扶了扶腰。此刻,我鼻子一酸,恨不得扇自己一巴掌:14年了,母亲处处为我着想,而我——我这不孝女,竟未为母亲做过一件事,即使是一件平平常常的小事!不知良心发现还是怎的,我开口说:“妈,我帮你洗吧!”母亲推辞了一番,在我的强求下还是答应了。此刻,母亲很幸福,我知道。这简短的六个字,如蜜一般的流进了母亲的心窝。
端来一盆温水,解开母亲发束上的皮筋,顿时,一头黑发霸占了眼前的世界。是啊,母亲的头发,打小就让我倾羡,宛若一道掺进了墨水的瀑布。不经意间,却有些许白色出现,是幻觉吧?定了神,原来,银色的头发也已经在母亲的头上蔓延。缓缓地梳着母亲黑中掺白的头发,泪水不听话的盘旋在眼眶中。
母亲低下头,我用温水把母亲的头发完全浸透,均匀地抹了些洗发露。双手在母亲的头皮上轻轻地揉着,思绪却已飞到了窗外。小鸟的叫声此时似乎有些哀婉,是小鸟也对不起她的母亲吗?“孩子,洗发水弄到眼睛了!”母亲嗔怪道。“哦,对不起。”我吐吐舌头。
帮母亲冲了冲水,仿佛冲掉的却不是泡沫,而是洗清了童年我与母亲的回忆。那时的我,四岁,很顽皮。一日,母亲帮我洗澡,由于性格问题,在澡盆中的我也不安分,结果不小心磕破了头,流了好多血。而母亲为这件事,却自责了好多天,连眼睛都哭肿了!小时候很傻,真的很傻,那时候想:妈妈哭什么哭,受伤的又不是他!现在才知道,是“伤在儿身,痛在娘心”啊!
帮母亲檫干头发,看着母亲脸上满是洋溢着的幸福,我也欣慰的笑了。
可怜天下父母心啊!用你的一份小爱,来回报母亲的无私之爱吧!
人们常说,父亲是那登天的梯,父亲是那拉车的牛;也有人说,父亲是家中的精神支柱,是全家的避风港。
一直以来,我都在寻找一个能代表父爱的动作——
抽烟
在他人心中,父亲如风雨中昂立的军人,父亲是悬崖边挺拔的青松,总之父亲是一个能顶天立地的男子汉。然而,在我心中,父亲只是一个烟鬼,正宗的烟鬼。他那早已被烟熏得焦黄的手指如今还一刻不停地夹着一支卷烟。
父亲爱抽烟,一直就是这样,我不知道为什么。无论在家还是外出,在他的身上都有一股浓浓的烟味,让我无法承受的一股烟味。尤其在临近我上学的时候,那股烟味变得更浓更令人难以承受了。此时的我,因担心学费未凑足而焦虑不安,而老爸他却还在悠闲地抽他的烟,似乎对我的事漠不关心。见他整天在深深地吸烟,然后又轻轻地吐出来,我恨不得把他赶出家门。此情此景,真让我欲哭无泪,欲恨不忍。难道这就是我的父亲?难道这就是所谓的“顶天立地”?他如此的“伟大”,我还有何话可说呢?
尽管如此,我还是被按时送到了学校,这让我迷惑了。我似乎正在慢慢察觉:在他深深地吸烟的同时,他也正在深思熟虑,在默默地担忧。再次回味那股烟味,发现了它有了一点淡淡的清香;再看到那缕烟影,我感觉到了其中笼罩了父亲的许多愁思。
回头
又一次父亲送我来校,临走时,他照旧没说什么,连一点笑容也没留下,转身便走了。面对如此冷淡的父亲,我无法理解,更无法接受。突然产了一个念头:去偷偷地监视他。正当他走到转弯处时,他停了下来,回过了头,只见他那充满深情的目光似乎在寻找什么,哦,是想再看一眼他的儿子,然而却没看见。他又转过头来,我终于被他发现。从他脸上终于隐隐呈现了一丝从未有过的笑容,那笑容如早晨的露珠一样晶莹剔透,一样短暂,一样难得。从他的那双眼中,我终于发现了人世间最美好的东西——无私的爱。
从此,这一精美的动作便深入了我的记忆宝库。多感人的一次回头!
终于,我彻底领悟了:我不是缺少父爱,而是缺少发现,那烟味充满浓香,那回头充满深情。同时我也理解了父爱:父爱如山,父爱似海,父亲冷淡的外表里装的是颗赤热的责任心,是颗真诚的爱子之心。试问父爱今何在?尽在一缕浓烟中,尽在回头一瞬间。
有诗如此说:我不记得我的母亲/只是在游戏中间/仿佛有一段歌调/在我玩具上回旋/是她在晃动我的摇篮/所哼的那些歌调……
无意中读到这位善于感恩的伟人泰戈尔的几句诗,它们犹如一缕和煦的风,吹皱我心中一池春水,让我心中涌动着一股热流,任思飘远……
当你在物竞天择适者生存的森林里发现,那狮子为了让幼儿学会生存的本领而忍心抛下它却在不远处守护着幼儿时,这用心良苦怎不令你动容!君可知,亲情是壁立千仞的高山,以厚实的胸怀让我们的心灵找到了归宿,亲情又是美妙绝伦的乐音,这淡淡的清音,如游丝般飘来,轻轻绾在一起,系住我们的心弦;君可知,亲情是无音之语,“相顾无言,惟有泪干行。”,亲情又是一丝牵挂,“遍插茱萸少一人,每逢佳节倍思亲。”君又可知,亲情如咖啡,给我们以苦涩,又予以芳香!亲情呀亲情,你虽是简简单单的两个字眼却已将温暖而绵长的爱点点滴滴地稀释在我们短暂而漫长的成长岁月中了呀。
《悲惨世界》中,临终前的冉阿让用那混浊而温和的双瞬原谅了女儿的罪过,对她轻说一句“不要紧,回来就好”时,怎不教她落泪?这一眼神,这一声音,胜似千言万语。有多少亲切,有多少爱怜,有多少温暖,构筑了芳汀女儿成长岁月中独特的风景。而她正因这浓浓的爱而懂得了感恩,感恩让她美好地成长着,活着。史铁生在“生命最狂妄的年龄残了双腿”,母亲用孱弱的身躯推着他的轮椅,用最深沉的爱让他在文学道路上成长。正是史铁生懂得感恩亲情,珍惜母亲伟大的爱,才让他有强大的勇气坚毅地活下来,顽强地活下来!在苦难而有美丽的成长中,感恩亲情,面对万丈深渊,成长的蜀道中多了,满腔往上奋爬的勇气!
再美的鲜花也会凋零,再美的青春也会老去,再美的影剧也会结束。
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