“王媛,你为什么不算分数啊?”一个熟悉的声音在耳边响起。“哦,美琦呀”我漫不经心的答了一句。“还没回答我的问题呢?”美琦依旧不依不饶,仿佛有打破砂锅问到底的精神。可我并不打算回答“不乐意就不算呗,哪有那么多为什么啊?”我没好气的答了一句。其实,不是不想算,而是怕算过之后心中更感到自卑,感觉自己落后越来越大,一个个红叉叉已经把心中的自信磨灭了3/4,我已经没有太多的自信去算什么分数了,我怕分数出来之后心中会更加难过,或许,逃避会让我的自信“飞一会儿”。……或许,逃避不是最好的选择。因为,别人会帮你冲在前面,打探事情的来龙去脉。一些风言风语终于引起了空气的振动,刺激了鼓膜,经过听小骨传入了我的听觉神经,进入了我的大脑的听觉中枢,引起了我的思考。“听说,这次王中正考的不错哦!”“不会是第一吧!”“很难说啊,这个时候的男生,不仅仅个头蹿的.快,成绩也上得很快呢!”我转做不经意的看着书,微微不经意的一皱眉,拳头不经意的一紧,心中不经意的一思考:“我怎么能这样,我不能让别人代替我的位置!我不能将好不容易努力来的第一拱手让人!”努力吧!进步吧!奋发吧!
“老师,我想知道我的级部排名!”在推开办公室大门的一刹那,我轻轻的道出了这句心中默念了千万遍的话。“第一”我释然了。
虽然来源于身边社会,但不可让描述方式变的太鸡毛蒜皮,拿不上台面。其实这点非常容易办到,只需要把事件中某一个具体的你,我,他,变成是客观群体,比如说people across the globe, students, they之类的人称即可。
举例的常见表达方式:
for example,/for instance,(后加句子)
Such as/ like (后加词组)
Take... as an example,
A case in point is that......
其次,在举例时还应注意尺度。
1. 应避免使用第一人称和第二人称,为了加强客观性,应将人称写成第三人称。
改正:Those people who raise pets, such as dogs and cats, are more likely to gain happiness and relieve their loneliness.(那些养宠物,例如养猫和养狗的人往往更容易获得快乐并且缓解孤独感)
2. 应避免引用一项调查研究,并同时伴有过多数据。应将数据去掉,用含糊的方法表示。
改正:There is much evidence to show that the number of people smoking has increased at an alarming rate in China. (大量证据表明。。。)
3. 应避免将例子局限在一个国家,尤其是中国。应将范围放至全世界。
改正:Many children around the world like to sit in front of the screen for a long time, leading to their poor eyesight.(在全世界,许多孩子在屏幕前待太久,导致了他们的视力减弱。
“全世界”的表达方式:around the world, all over the world, across the globe
【写作真题】The advocates of international aid believe that countries have a moral obligation to help each other, while the opponents consider it necessary, because money is misspent by the governments that receive it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
【名师献计】This aid is essential to the homeless and useful in helping recipient countries return to their normal state after major disturbances. For example, with the humanitarian relief obtained worldwide on an annual basis, victims of natural disasters (such as tsunami, drought, flood throughout the world can recover rapidly and rebuild their homeland.
此类例子往往缺乏客观性和说服力,由于第一人称的局限导致所叙述事件难免“鸡毛蒜皮”。要明白,个人不代表整体。
例:I keep my dog to avoid my loneliness and I find a lot of fun.
这样的例子让人犹如在看记叙文,和议论文很不搭调。
太多专业数据会给人捏造的痕迹,缺乏真实性。考官会质疑数据的出处。
例:A survey indicates that the number of people smoking has increased to as high as 65 percent in China.(一项调查显示。。。)
"65%"让文章看起来有些假,有捏造的嫌疑。"A survey"又不够具有代表性。
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