我想去楚地,看看不一样的风景。拜别父母,背上行囊,乘着小舟,顺着长江水而下。
两岸怪石嶙峋,黄石碧岩,高与天齐,细细的山尖仿佛随时都会坠落下来,山谷中那一堆堆被春雨洗涤得碧绿的藤蔓,从上而下直浸入江心。江坡上绿茸茸的草地似轻柔的摇篮托着两岸的群山峻岭。江面汹涌澎湃,水花四溅,江涛随着山峦激荡,山影水影,日光水光,交织一片,气势雄伟,我还未来得及细看,舟已似离箭一样飞速向前。
行舟百余里,水面逐渐平缓,松开抓紧船栏的双手,环视四周,却发觉仅仅片刻已行过万里到达了长江中游,青山逐渐清失了,眼前是一望无垠的原野,远眺不远处的小山坡上,安卧着一片小村庄,袅袅炊烟扶摇直上,正如陶渊明笔下的“暧暧远人村,依依墟里烟”。舟缓缓前行,只见河堤上孩子们放着五彩缤纷的纸鸢,尽情的撒着欢;大人们站在家门口翘首张望,大概是期盼着孩子们早点归家吧。我看着这静静的江水,突然潸然泪下。
夕阳挥洒完最后一缕光芒,便退身隐居于深山之后,月亮撕开浓厚的黑云,露出她那皎洁的脸庞,银光四射,如未打磨的明镜一般,朦朦胧胧,呼之欲出,两岸的平原也被渲染得如玉似锦,满天的星辰顿时也黯然失色。忽然四周一片昏暗,仰望空中,云海波动升降起伏变化无常,时而似蛟龙戏珠,盘旋飞舞;时而如九尾仙凤,直冲九天;时而像银花玉枝,瑰丽妩媚。正值兴头,不知何处袭来一阵劲风,卷着点点黄沙刺入我的眼睛,我揉揉眼,再看,周围又一片通亮,云海消失得无影无踪,一切都亦真亦幻。
在月色的照耀下,我躺在行舟的怀抱,任凭江水送我前行。雨点轻柔地打落在我的脸上,凉凉的,我睁开双眼,平静的江面上,只有我的一叶小舟,低头轻抚水面,望着水面上的孤影,我知道我已经离开家乡了……
导入:
第1段:Recently we’ve had a discussion about whether we should... (导入话题
Our opinions are divided on this topic.(观点有分歧
正文:
第2段:Most of the students are in favour of it.(正方观点
Here are the reasons. First... Second... Finally...(列出2~3个赞成的理由
第3段:However, the others are strongly against it. (反方观点
Their reasons are as follows. In the first place... What’s more... In addition...(列出2~3个反对的理由
结论:
第4段:Personally speaking, the advantages overweigh the disadvantages, for it will do us more harm than good, so I support it.(个人观点 オ
荆门,山名,在今湖北省宜都县西北的长江南岸,隔江与虎牙山对峙,战国时属于楚国。
李白在蜀度过了童年和少年时代。二十五岁;他开始远游长江,黄河中下游各地。这首诗即是他出蜀远游时所写。诗题为《渡荆门送别》,沈德潜认为“诗中无送别意,题中二字可删”(《唐诗别裁》。看来此论未免欠妥。送别,并非写诗人送别同舟人。从本诗最后两句可知,原来“送别”所指,是指“故乡水”送别诗人。近人俞陛云亦说:“末二句叙别意,言客踪所至,工水与之俱远,送行者心亦随之矣。”(《诗境浅说》
这首诗是借景抒情之作。构思巧妙。脉络井井有条,结构波澜起伏,颇有层次。
开头两句是总叙,陈述诗人离开家乡,千里迢迢,乘船渡过荆门。来到古代楚国属地漫游。“渡远”,是“远渡”的倒写。“来从”,是来作之意。看来这两句并不是什么惊人之笔,但它与以下诗句都密切关合,丝丝相扣,具有穿针引线、贯串全诗的重要作用。
“山随平野尽”以下四句,是倒叙。“山随平野尽,江入大荒流”两句,是写诗人坐在船上,举目所见地面上的景色变化。这两句所写,容量很大。有阔大的空间的立体感和漫长时间的行进感。它写诗人从四川乘船,沿着长江,顺流而下,穿过蜿蜒起伏,千姿百态、高耸入云的三峡。来到辽阔的湖北平原,高山峻岭逐渐消失,随着山势的变化,滚滚奔腾而来的长江,也渐渐平静下来,在广阔的原野上,缓缓东流。它用高度凝炼的语言。极其概括地写出了诗人整个行程的地理变化。这两句,与杜甫的“星随平野阔,月涌大江流”(《旅夜书怀》两句诗,同为佳句,却各尽其妙。所不同的是,李白的两句诗描写的是白天的景致,杜甫的两句诗描写的是夜晚的景色,李诗是“行舟暂视”,杜诗是“停舟细观”(王琦《李太白文集》辑注,并无优劣可分。
“月下飞天镜,云生结海楼”俩句,是描绘太空的夜景,诗人坐在船上,抬头遥看万里长空,只见一轮明月,犹如天上飞下的明镜,皎洁澄澈,普照大地,那飘荡在碧空的.朵朵彩云,忽而连结在一起,由于折光的作用,便构成了非常壮观的海市蜃楼的幻影。这两句都是用鲜明的形象作比,描绘太空的迷人景致,表现出诗人的丰富想象力。对于“月下飞天镜”一句,有人解释说:月亮映入江水,好象从空中飞下的明镜。这种训释,似乎失于确当。“月下飞天镜”,诗意异常明显。即月亮从太空运转而下,就好象从天上飞下的明镜。这里并无“月亮映入江水”之意。辛弃疾词写道:“一轮秋影转金波,飞镜又重磨。”(《太常引》他把月亮比作从天上飞下的明镜,与李白诗意完全相同。俞陛云说:“五六句写江中所见,以天镜喻月之光明。以海楼喻云之奇特,惟江天高旷,故所见如此。若在院宇中观云月,无此状也。”(同上见解非同凡响,不失为的评。
最后“仍怜故乡水,万里送行舟”俩句,紧扣“送别”的诗题,与开头两句写诗人离蜀远游的诗意遥相呼应。李白五岁后至二十五岁之前,都是在蜀度过的。他酷爱故乡的山山水水,对故土产生了浓厚的感情。诗人突然别离家乡到异地远游,自然会产生惜别之情,这也可以说是一种“离情别绪”吧。这两句诗的妙处在于,明明是诗人有离乡惜别的情思,而又不直说,反而采用拟人化手法,说“故乡水”对自己怀有深情,不辞劳苦。从四川一直送他到荆门外,即“万里送行舟”。采用这种拟人化的手法。比直抒胸臆,陈述离乡之情,显得更曲折含蓄,更有诗味和情趣。
总之,这首诗在艺术上是比较成功的,写得曲折含蓄、波澜起伏,忽而写地面上的山光水色,忽而写太空的奇异景象;忽而写白天对山峦起伏、江流奔腾的大自然的欣赏,忽而又写夜晚对太空景象变幻的享受。最后才用拟人化手法,曲折含蓄地表现诗人离乡惜别的情思。我们透过诗人对大自然景象的细致观察和欣赏,就能到青年诗人刚刚走向社会的那种积极进取的精神,及其兴致勃勃的无穷活力。尤其“山随平野尽,江入大荒流”两句,逼真地描写出诗人乘船穿过三峡,崇山峻岭,逐渐消失在广阔的原野上;汹涌澎湃的万里长江,随着山势的消失,在一望无际的平原上缓缓东流……诗人就使用这种白描的笔触,淡淡的色彩,描绘出一幅非常真实的山水画卷,给后代人们留下了领略不尽的审美感受。
1。 头绪分明,脉络清楚
写好记叙文,首先要头绪分明,脉络清楚,明确文章要求写什么。要对所写的事件或人物进行分析,弄清事件发生、发展一直到结束的整个过程,然后再收集选取素材。这些素材都应该跟上述五个“ W ”和一个“ H ”有关。尽管不是每篇记叙文里都必须包括这些“ W ”和“ H ”,但动笔之前,围绕五个“ W ”和“ H ”进行构思是必不可少的。
2。 突出中心,详略得当
在文章的框架确定后,对支持故事的素材的选取是很关键的。选材要注意取舍,应该从表现文章主题的需要出发,分清主次,定好详略。要突出重点,详写细述那些能表现文章主题的重要情节,略写粗述那么非关键的次要情节。面面俱到反而使情节罗列化,使人不得要领。这一点是写好记叙文要解决的一个基本问题,也需要一定的技巧。如:
One night a man came to our house and told me, "There is a family with eight children。 They have not eaten for days。" I took some food with me and went。
When I finally came to that family, I saw the faces of those little children disfigured (破坏外貌) by hunger。 There was no sorrow or sadness in their faces, just the deep pain of hunger。
I gave the rice to the mother。 She divided the rice in two, and went out, carrying half the rice。 When she came back, I asked her, "Where did you go?" she gave me this simple answer, "To my neighbors — they are hungry also!"
3。 用活语言,准确生动
记叙文要用具体的事件和生动的语言对人、事、物加以叙述。一篇好的记叙文的语言既要准确、生动,又要表现力强,这样才能把人、事描写得具体生动,其可读性才强。试比较下面一篇例文修改的前后效果。
原文:
One day Xiaoqiang was wandering away。 He was soon lost among people and traffic。 He could not find the way back home and started crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by found him standing alone in front of a shop and crying。 They went up to Xiaoqiang and asked him what had happened。 Xiaoqiang told them how he got lost and where he lived。 The two students decided to take him home。 Mother was pleased to see Xiaoqiang come back safe and sound。 She invited the two students into the house and gave them some money, but they didn't take it。 She served them with tea but they left。
修改后:
The other day, five-year-old Xiaoqiang left home alone and wandered happily in the street。 After some time, he felt hungry so he wanted to go back home。 But he found he was lost among the crowded people and heavy traffic。 When he could not find the way home, he started and crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by from school found him sanding crying in front of a shop。 They immediately went up to him。
"Little boy, why are you standing here crying?" they asked。
"I want Mom, I go home。" said the boy, still crying。
"Don't worry, we'll send you home。"
And they spent the next two hours looking for the boy's house。 With the help of a policeman, they finally found it。
When the worried mother saw her son come back safe and sound, she was so thankful and she invited the students into her house。 Gratefully, she offered them some money, saying it was a way to express her thanks, but the young students firmly refused it and left without even a cup of tea。
I was born in a beautiful town with high mountains around it.The mountains are covered with all kinds of green bamboo.Through the town runs a small stream.It’s said that a new railway is going to be built to the east of the town and a bamboo factory to the west.All the children of the school age can go to school.If anyone is ill,he can go to see the doctor in the newly-built hospital.People in the town are hard-working and never take the backwardness lying down.Though they are having a richer and better life,they are not satisfied with what they have got.They are working hard to build their town into a modern one.
导入:
第1段:提出一种现象或某个决定作为议论的话题
As a student, I am strongly in favour of the decision. (亮明自己的观点是赞成还是反对
The reasons for this may be listed as follows. (过渡句,承上启下
正文:
第2段:First of all... Secondly... Besides...(列出2~3个赞成或反对的`理由
结论:
第3段:In conclusion, I believe that... (照应第1段,构成"总—分—总"结构
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