四级阅卷老师作文给分【一】
议论文是论述问题的，当然要有一定的思路，即议论文各部分之间要有必然的内在联系。我们知道，议论文是论证问题的，你在提出议论文论点后，就要摆事实，讲道理，让你提出的论点令人信服地确立起来。因此，中心论点和各分论点之间就应当是因果联系，即中心论点是“果”，分论点是“因”。这个因果联系就是议论文的思路之“格”。
作为一个高中生的议论文作文，最起码要做到在中心论点和各分论点之间，论点和论据之间要有一定的因果联系。
学生提出中心论点后，只要围绕中心论点问一个“为什么”，就能找到提出分论点的方向。如中心论点是“只有坚守，才能使人的思想品德升华，才能成就一番事业”。稍加分析，就可发现这个观点是在说“坚守”的重要性，于是，分论点就要回答“为什么坚守很重要”这个问题。那么就可从“为什么”和“何果”这两个向度来立分论点。如“坚守是一种执着，使绝望变成希望”，“坚守是一种信念，使普通变得高尚”，“坚守是一种职责，使平凡变得伟大”。如果我们要检验这三个分论点和中心论点之间有没有必然的内在联系的话，只需在这三个分论点之前加上“因为”，在“坚守很重要”之前加上“所以”，再连起来念一下即可。
同样，分论点和议论文的论据之间，也应当是因果联系。如在“坚守是一种职责，使平凡变得伟大”这个分论点后面，就可这样展开论述：“边防战士的坚守，使国家安定祥和；人民教师的坚守，使桃李满天下；白衣天使的坚守，使病魔为之屈服。”又如在“自由是思想的漫飞”这个分论点下可以这样展开论述：“行动可以受制于客观现实，思想却永远享受绝对的自由。有了这份思想的自由，才有了集豪放与浪漫于一身的诗仙李白；才有了身陷囹圄还在感叹“故国不堪回首月明中”的落魄后主李煜；才有了向往“面朝大海，春暖花开”的天才诗人海子。总之，因为这份思想的自由，社会才会在其牵引之下不断地进步，才会创造出一个个永载史册的人类奇迹。”
四级阅卷老师作文给分【二】
春天， 万物复苏，小河水哗哗地顺流而下； 活泼机灵的小鸟们在枝头喳喳地纵情歌唱； 小草们神不知鬼不觉地从地下探出了脑袋，大地换上了绿色的新衣； 小野花们争先恐后地展示着自己的美丽； 一棵棵大树好像正在返老还童， 抽出嫩黄色的新芽；。年迈的`凤凰木也紧跟着春天的步伐， 吐出米粒大小的嫩叶， 就像刚出生的婴儿那般娇嫩。
夏天，太阳像一个火炉似地炙烤着地面。凤凰木的叶子早已变成了深绿色，枝条也向四周扩展了许多，变成了一把绿色的大伞。当太阳透过茂密的树叶筛下一束束金光时， 美丽的凤凰花绽开了一张张笑脸，好像给凤凰木披上了红色的霞衣。
秋天，凤凰树的叶子慢慢地变成了金黄色，在微风吹拂下纷纷飘落下来， 给地面铺上了一层厚厚的金色地毯。课间十分钟，我和小伙伴们在凤凰树下尽情地玩耍、嬉闹，甭提有多高兴了。
冬天，刺骨的寒风从耳边呼呼地刮过，古老的凤凰木褪去了繁华，仿佛一个弯着腰、知识渊博的老学者，正在讲述着她一百多年来的沧桑岁月， 并勉励我们克服各种困难、勤奋学习，成为对国家有贡献的人才。
这就是我们百年老校的百年古树---凤凰木。
四级阅卷老师作文给分【三】
Dear all,
I am writing this letter to express my gratitude to my parents for teaching me to be positive and to be strong. “Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all.” is the opinion held by Aristotle. It is the experience of our forefathers, however, it is correct even today, including my parenting.
It is widely acknowledged that parenting, which can also be explained as family education, is of great significance in our character forming and manner acquiring. To be more detailed, setting good examples instead of just giving precepts is the greatest achievement of my parents. They not only taught me to think for the best and prepare for the worst; they taught me how. They not only told me the benefits of being strong in mind; they proved it. All those things require huge amount of time and work, but it’s worth it.
Without my parents’ contribution and education, I would never be who I am now. But most importantly, I would never be more gratitude to them than today.
Yours,
XXX
四级阅卷老师作文给分【四】
一篇像样的议论文，除了议论文的`结构合体、思路入格外，还有更重要的一个方面，就是对论点的恰当阐述和对论据的中肯分析；没有这样的阐述和分析，议论文论点论据就不能粘连起来，而这个粘连是有“术”的。
（一）观点+过渡+事例+分析
这个步骤中最重要的是“过渡”和“分析”。所谓“过渡”就是要在观点和事例之间，用适当的词句来勾连，以接通文气，使观点和议论文材料在语言形式上畅通无阻。所谓“分析”，就是事例叙述完之后，还必须对事例进行适当的分析评论，指出其本质特点，使事例和论点在内容上联结在一起。例如：议论文范文3
（二）观点+过渡+论据+分析+归纳
这种议论文论证方式就是在第一种的基础上加了一个“归纳”。所谓归纳，就是从多个事例中提炼出必然性的东西。既然要从多个事例中提炼，那么，“论据”部分，就应是两个或三个以上。例如：议论文范文4
（三）一般道理+个别道理
即“演绎推理法”。前面的分析归纳是从个别到一般，而演绎推理法是从一般到个别，用普遍性的真理（论据）来证明特殊的论点的方法。例如：议论文范文5
如果完成了以上三步走，大概就能写出像样的议论文了。
四级阅卷老师作文给分【五】
Nowadays, many famous university campuses have become one of the popular tourist attractions. It has been shown on TV and on the radio that every year thousands and thousands of middle school students visit Tsing Hua University and Peking University and other famous universities in China. In the place far away from the capital city, the local students also visit the universities famous in their own province.
So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to open the university campus for tourists? Different people have different opinions. On one hand, some people argued that it is a good thing for the students to visit the famous university campus in that it can enable the middle students to get more information about the university and they can have enough time and opportunity to prepare themselves with the chance to get into the university. On the other hand, some people hold a negative view about this phenomenon. In their opinion, the public tourism will have negative effect on the universities because it will not only do harm to the environment but also to the intellectual atmosphere.
In my opinion, the tourism to the universities is not a good thing. The campus is mainly a place for study. With the increasing tourism on the campus, it will ruin the spiritual atmosphere in this learning field.
首先，提纯范文 “谋篇布局”及结构模板。
第一段：提出问题或现象。Nowadays, … … have become one of the popular … …. It has been shown on TV and on the radio that … ….
第二段：正反列举人们的看法。So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to … …? Different people have different opinions. On one hand, some people argued that it is a good thing for … … in that … …. On the other hand, some people hold a negative view about this phenomenon. In their opinion, … … will have negative effect on … … because it will not only do harm to … … but also to … ….
第三段：摆明自己观点。In my opinion, … … is not a good thing. … … With the increasing … …, it will ruin … ….
其次，提纯范文“段落写作”。
段落写作分为统一性，连贯性和完整性三方面。
统一性(unity：段落开头的主题句应该做到不可太宽泛，也不可太具体，做到有较强的概括性才能使下文做到有的放矢的展开。范文第二段首句以设问的方式提出一个问题is it a good or bad thing就有很强的概况性。下文自然会一方面从好的方面说明，另一方面从坏的方面说明。
连贯性(coherence：关联词是使文章段落之间相互连贯的必要条件。范文中nowadays, on one hand, on the other hand, in one’s opinion即以“启承转合”递进的顺序是文章条理清晰，层层展开。
完整性(completeness：以设问句“So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to open the university campus for tourists?”开头，这是平时较少运用的段落写作方式——设问法。“On one hand … …. On the other hand, … ….”是段落写作分类列举法的典型用法。
再次，提纯范文“句子写作”。
1. It has been shown that … …
类似句型：It is known to us that … …
It is said that … …
It is reported that … …
It is controversial that … …
2. “… … Tsing Hua University and Peking University and other famous universities … …。”——并列句。并列句是简单的复杂句。但其运用方法并不简单，注意练习并接句的使用，会使句子显的更加饱满。
3. enable v. 使…能够
I gave him full directions to enable him to find the house.
4. in that = because
表“因为”的连词还有since, for, as，如：
The boy was absent because he was ill. = The boy was absent since he was ill.
此句以我们常用的人称开头，句式简单，我们可以通过把since提前改变句式，如：
Since the boy was ill, he was absent. 句式多样化。
最后，提纯范文“措辞”。
1. attraction n. 具有吸引力的事情。
2. thousands and thousands 成千上万的
形容“多”的表达方法：millions and millions
a multitude of
a great deal of
a large amount of
plenty of
many a
3. “some people argued that … …”中的“argue”并不是“讨论，辩论”的意思，而是“认为”。
I argue that … …
I maintain that … …
I claim that … …
I insist that … … = I think that … …
I hold that … …
I assert that … …
I assume that … …
4. negative adj. 否定的.，相反的
hold negative view = hold opposite opinions
5. phenomenon n. 现象
social phenomenon 社会现象
natural phenomenon 自然现象
6. intellectual adj. 聪明的= intelligent, bright, clever
(选词策略：使用最近所学的单词，如intellectual > intelligent > bright > clever
在分析并掌握范文之后，我们需要运用范文知识练习仿写。笔者运用2005年12月范文中的模板结构仿写了2006年12月的四级作文，以供参考：
1. 许多人喜欢在除夕夜看春节晚会
2. 但有些人提出取消春节晚会
3. 我的看法
Nowadays, the Spring Festival Evening has become one of the popular topic and attractions during every traditional New Year’s Eve. It has been shown on TV and on the radio that every year thousands and thousands of Chinese people appear to be accustomed to enjoying the sights and sounds of a brilliant feast, while gathering with their beloved family.
However, an increasing number of people have voiced different opinions towards it. So far as the present situation is concerned, is it a good or bad thing to cancel the Spring Festival Evening? Different people have different opinions. On one hand, some people argued that it is a good thing to amuse the audience in that it is composed by a numerous adequate programs, such as the emotional song, the graceful dance, the funny short sketch, the amusing comic dialogue, the delightful magic, and the marvelous acrobatics and so on. On the other hand, some people hold a negative view about this phenomenon. In their opinion, the Spring Festival Evening will have negative effect on the family harmony because it will not only do harm to having the talks between family members on the Spring Festival Eve but also to enjoying the gourmet meal in a fancy restaurant.
In my opinion, the Spring Festival Evening is a good thing. It may not remain a must for all people, but it can bring us a strong sense of festivity and serve as an alternative among the variety of holiday activities. With the increasing audience of the Spring Festival Evening, it will ruin a distinctive culture during the Spring Festival vacation.
四级阅卷老师作文给分【六】
议论文，分析事实，论证道理，当然要遵循一定的思维规律；这种思维规律反映在文章的外部形态上，就是具有一定体式的文章的结构。怎样写议论文才算“合体”呢？
一是根据议论问题的一般思维模式，应当是按“提出问题、分析问题、解决问题”（或曰“引论”、“本论”、“结论”）三大块构成。“提出问题”即在议论文开头一般要鲜明地提出中心论点，“分析问题”即在文章的中间要围绕中心论点展开分析论证，“解决问题”即在文章的结尾部分或者得出综合性结论，或者提出前瞻性希望等。这一点，众所周知，兹不赘述。
二是分析问题即本论部分，要按一定的向度分层展开论述。所谓“向度”即论述展开的方向。这个“向度”有四个：是什么，为什么，怎么样，何果。一般情况下，一篇中学生议论文作文，其本论部分只要从这四个向度中选择一个或者两个展开即可。但无论是从哪个向度展开，其分论点之间都要形成一定的联系。一般来说，有并列式、递进式和对照式三种。
所谓并列式，就是围绕中心从同一个向度列出几个分论点，逐一论证。如果仅仅围绕一个向度写，那么几个分论点之间的关系大多是并列关系。例如：议论文范文1
递进式同并列式结构相比，除了论点之间的意义联系不同以外，其段落的结构模式与并列式相同，就不再说了。
所谓对照式，就是从论题的正反两个方面入手，进行正反对比论证得出结论。其优点是结构简洁，论证充分，容易上手。最简单的对照式是在提出观点后，一段从正面论证观点，一段从反面论证观点，最后得出结论。还有一种对照式结构是在正面进行论述或者摆出论据后，紧接着用转折或者假设的方式从反面展开论述。例如：议论文范文2
