这篇文章很长,合适的切入点至关重要,巧妙的设计不仅体现老师对文本的理解程度,更彰显其教学智慧。窦老师显然是经过深思熟虑的----拉出作者的感悟直指中心(父爱的伟大,母爱的温柔),然后落在了作者的表现手法上(抓住人物的语言描写)短短几分钟,快刀斩乱麻,干净利落地避免了繁琐分析,跳出了长文短教的贯见模式,教学目标初见端倪落在语言描写上。
又一次默读,这次要求用波浪线和直线画出母亲、父亲的话,至于什么线画谁的话,学生自己决定。这样的设计,这是第一次听到,看到,学生的答案精彩纷呈,没有标准答案,但谁说的都有道理,都有自己的理解、思考、感悟在里面。语言不仅仅是用来朗读、积累的,它最本质的是用来表达人的内心世界,体现人的思维变化的。这一设计的确是匠心独运。
1。 头绪分明,脉络清楚
写好记叙文,首先要头绪分明,脉络清楚,明确文章要求写什么。要对所写的事件或人物进行分析,弄清事件发生、发展一直到结束的整个过程,然后再收集选取素材。这些素材都应该跟上述五个“ W ”和一个“ H ”有关。尽管不是每篇记叙文里都必须包括这些“ W ”和“ H ”,但动笔之前,围绕五个“ W ”和“ H ”进行构思是必不可少的。
2。 突出中心,详略得当
在文章的框架确定后,对支持故事的素材的选取是很关键的。选材要注意取舍,应该从表现文章主题的需要出发,分清主次,定好详略。要突出重点,详写细述那些能表现文章主题的重要情节,略写粗述那么非关键的次要情节。面面俱到反而使情节罗列化,使人不得要领。这一点是写好记叙文要解决的一个基本问题,也需要一定的技巧。如:
One night a man came to our house and told me, "There is a family with eight children。 They have not eaten for days。" I took some food with me and went。
When I finally came to that family, I saw the faces of those little children disfigured (破坏外貌) by hunger。 There was no sorrow or sadness in their faces, just the deep pain of hunger。
I gave the rice to the mother。 She divided the rice in two, and went out, carrying half the rice。 When she came back, I asked her, "Where did you go?" she gave me this simple answer, "To my neighbors — they are hungry also!"
3。 用活语言,准确生动
记叙文要用具体的事件和生动的语言对人、事、物加以叙述。一篇好的记叙文的语言既要准确、生动,又要表现力强,这样才能把人、事描写得具体生动,其可读性才强。试比较下面一篇例文修改的前后效果。
原文:
One day Xiaoqiang was wandering away。 He was soon lost among people and traffic。 He could not find the way back home and started crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by found him standing alone in front of a shop and crying。 They went up to Xiaoqiang and asked him what had happened。 Xiaoqiang told them how he got lost and where he lived。 The two students decided to take him home。 Mother was pleased to see Xiaoqiang come back safe and sound。 She invited the two students into the house and gave them some money, but they didn't take it。 She served them with tea but they left。
修改后:
The other day, five-year-old Xiaoqiang left home alone and wandered happily in the street。 After some time, he felt hungry so he wanted to go back home。 But he found he was lost among the crowded people and heavy traffic。 When he could not find the way home, he started and crying。 Just then, two young students who were passing by from school found him sanding crying in front of a shop。 They immediately went up to him。
"Little boy, why are you standing here crying?" they asked。
"I want Mom, I go home。" said the boy, still crying。
"Don't worry, we'll send you home。"
And they spent the next two hours looking for the boy's house。 With the help of a policeman, they finally found it。
When the worried mother saw her son come back safe and sound, she was so thankful and she invited the students into her house。 Gratefully, she offered them some money, saying it was a way to express her thanks, but the young students firmly refused it and left without even a cup of tea。
导入:
第1段:提出一种现象或某个决定作为议论的话题
As a student, I am strongly in favour of the decision. (亮明自己的观点是赞成还是反对
The reasons for this may be listed as follows. (过渡句,承上启下
正文:
第2段:First of all... Secondly... Besides...(列出2~3个赞成或反对的`理由
结论:
第3段:In conclusion, I believe that... (照应第1段,构成"总—分—总"结构
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